"I Just Wanted to Be Black"
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Vern Farkas just wanted to fit in with the "urban crowd". He figured the easiest way to meet and hang with some new homies was to show his allegence to the African American Minority, in fact he thought it was going to be down right easy to start hanging on the stoop drinking malt liquor for a buck and a quarter with his neighbors from across the street, "They are always having so much darn fun, laugh and hollaring, and you know smoking reefer. I just wanted to be one of them, I wanted to be part of the gang."
Vern, who refers to himself as the "Big V", had an idea, "Big V knew what to do! it was really simple, I decided to vote for Obama! Black People love him, he is one of theirs, now Big V and the Big O are tight."
Farkas continued, "I mean Oback is from the hood, CHI-TOWN!!! YOU KNOW!!!! I am a huge Bulls fan and when I saw Big O rocking at the United Center, I just knew that me and the fellas were gonna be tight. I just knew I would be on da stoop, crack'n on fools."
Farkas took the Bus in the Western Suburbs and started hunting for Obama/Biden lawn signs. He came home with three signs and by the end of the day he had them all displayed proudly in his apartment Window.
He figured by the next afternoon all his would be homies would be down with the "Big V". Unfortunately Farkas's walk across the street didn't go as well as planned. "I figure it is just their way, you know like jumping me in. They acted like they didn't even know who Obama was, and then they pushed me off the stoop. Sure I hit my head but I shook it off."
The next day Farkas believed it went better, "Man they were clowning me! it was awesome! They told me to get one of my yard signs, when I brought it back Jerome and Duggins held me down as G-Dog and Ray-Ray shoved the sign up my Ass!"
When asked about the assult all Jerome had to say was, "Fuck'n crackers. Where my money?"
