12 pound turkey challenge

[SkinBasket]

Fuck me.

Anyway, if I don't lose 12 pounds by Thanksgiving, I'm going to masturbate into a jar then artificially inseminate my neutered cat. How's that for consequences?

I weigh more than most of you today. I didn't exercise today because I'm sick. Everyone's sick. Even the cocksucking cat is sick. He hasn't eaten in two days, maybe three. He might die soon. I hope he does it tonight, because the garbage truck comes tomorrow. I last exercised last Wednesday, when I submitted two blue belts at jiu jitsu. One of them blew snot all over his face while I choked him. The other just gave up because I was suffocating him in my loins while working a kimura on his old ass.

Breakfast: water.
Lunch: Frappachino. Vanilla.
Dinner: Fried rice, tortilla chips and salsa con queso (that means cheese with salsa madtown) and like 5 or 6 mini candy bars.


I used to love you. Now I would throw you down a well without a second thought.

[Scott Campbell]

Sometimes I keep my feelings all bottled up inside of me. I'll bet the neighborhood cats are relieved.

[HowardRoark]

I'm going to masturbate into a jar then artificially inseminate my neutered cat.

Be careful with your wrist.

[Freak Out]

I never realized you could fuck up formatting so much with just text?

[MJZiggy]

What the hell happened?

Would it make you feel better if I told you that today I had:

breakfast: hot chocolate and mixed nuts
tea
lunch: rice noodle soup, cheetos, 2 cookies, peanut m&ms
dinner: yogurt, cheese, a peanut butter cup and I'll think of something else eventually.

[SkinBasket]

I never realized you could fuck up formatting so much with just text?

My apologies. It has been fixed.

[SkinBasket]

What the hell happened?

I forgot to add the dinner bottle of pinot grigio + 1 glass of Riesling (for dessert).

[hoosier]

What's the rumpus? What happened to the previous turkey thread, the one with all the declarations and prognostications about lifting weights and losing weight and eating or not eating?

[SkinBasket]

weight: 204
exercise: none

breakfast: golden grahams and 2% milk
lunch: potatoes au gratin and 2% milk
dinner: 1 dozen crab rangoons, 1 mild beef szechuan beef with white rice, 3 vodka gimlets, and 1 peppermint candy.

Fuck ya'll.

[Zool]

Holy shit a dozen? Way to eat chubbs

[SkinBasket]

Holy shit a dozen? Way to eat chubbs

Yeah, well it's 7:30am and I've taken my 3rd shit of the day already.

[SkinBasket]

4.

[Little Whiskey]

4.

Wow, impressive.

[SkinBasket]

4.

Wow, impressive.

5. This one had an entirely undigested shitake mushroom in it.

[mraynrand]

This thread should be in the Sons of Anarchy thread

[Little Whiskey]

4.

Wow, impressive.

5. This one had an entirely undigested shitake mushroom in it.

you should really chew your food before you swallow. digestion starts in the mouth. without proper chewing your stomach has little chance.

you might also choke.

[SkinBasket]

weight: 200.8
exercise: unwilling colon cleansing and the exhausting daily labor of raising two boys

breakfast: golden grahams and 2% milk
lunch: turkey and potatoes au gratin and 2% milk
diner: beef tenderloin stroganoff with garlic, mushrooms, and green onion served over egg noodles and topped with Parmesan cheese, a handful of potato chips, and two walnut/coconut cookies with a bottle of Sterling Pinot Noir.

While my weight has remained constant, the muscular gains have visually offset my belly. That provides motivation to start actually getting in shape soon.

[Freak Out]

Basket old boy...you need to find a way to work some wonderful spam into the diet.

[SkinBasket]

I totally worked out today. Details to follow.

[SkinBasket]

weight: 201.5
exercise: weights (chest, back, quads), balance ball sit-ups, and some pilates leg crap for my core and ass.

breakfast: sweat and tears
lunch: ham, sweet potatoes, and potatoes au gratin with 2% milk
diner: 2/3 of a cheese pizza, 2 beef stcks, 6 cheese cubes, 1 cookie, and 5 mini candy bars, and 4 gimlets.

I need to stay hydrated better. I had to get up like 4 times last night just to get a drink of water. I guess that counts as exercise too though.