What is the man law regarding ex-gf's?

[arcilite]

I'm kind of at a difficult spot here.

My friend dated this girl for about two years...but they have been broken up for about a year now.


They had a bad breakup...aka they stopped talking to each other. But I kept talking to this girl because me and her were good friends. I told my friend this, he didn't mind.


My friend lives about 3 hours away from me...and this girl just moved 20 minutes away from me last week.

And we are gonna see a movie this weekend and have been talking about going to bball and hockey games. Its not a date, but our conversations are more flirtatious each day.

Shes hot. I want to do naughty things with her.

Only thing is, It might be a bad idea considering how she is a friends' ex. But then I say to myself 'its not every day girls as pretty as her want to hang out with you this much'.

And its been over a year since theyve dated. You guys think all exes are off limits...or is 1 yr the right time to wait. This is my only place to ask, the other online forums I post at...he does too, and we have too many mutual friends for meto ask. I can't take chances. hahah

[SkinBasket]

Fuck her. He will never be your soul mate. She might be. She wins.

[BallHawk]

Fuck her. He will never be your soul mate. She might be. She wins.

QFT.

[hoosier]

How close is the friend? Someone you see all the time or a couple times a year? I don't know you or your friend, but I would guess that if you start hanging out with his ex, you're not going to be able to look at him in the face--and he's not going to want to see yours--for a long time. Think long and hard about which is worth more in the long run, the (good?) friend or the new shiny thing on the block.

[GrnBay007]

Are you sure she's over him? ..or could she want to date you to piss him off? If that's the case you may end up with neither in the end.

[MJZiggy]

Dude knows you two are friends and has no problem with that, why not see if he'd be cool with it?

[Tyrone Bigguns]

The man law says you don't date her.

But, if you think it will be long term relationship..then you should man up and tell your buddy.

If it is a short term thing...is it worth potentially ruining a friendship over a piece of ass?

Edit: If you haven't seen him in 6 months..you aren't friends. That is a college buddy. THere is a difference.

[arcilite]

How close is the friend? Someone you see all the time or a couple times a year? I don't know you or your friend, but I would guess that if you start hanging out with his ex, you're not going to be able to look at him in the face--and he's not going to want to see yours--for a long time. Think long and hard about which is worth more in the long run, the (good?) friend or the new shiny thing on the block.

We were college buddies, but we both graduated within the last 12 months. I havnt seen him in 6 months or so.


I'm not a relationship kind of guy. I might just try for a hit-n-run, then play dumb and pretend nothing happened.

[hoosier]

Sounds like a plan. Just be sure you don't have any incriminating dents on the front of your car.... :)

[Partial]

Not worth it. Not cool. If I was said guy, I would hit you with a pipe.

[SkinBasket]

Not worth it. Not cool. If I was said guy, I would hit you with a pipe.

You would clean your own pipes thinking about it. Big difference.

[bobblehead]

Are you sure she's over him? ..or could she want to date you to piss him off? If that's the case you may end up with neither in the end.

typical chic response....you forget he still gets laid so its a win

[Tyrone Bigguns]

Are you sure she's over him? ..or could she want to date you to piss him off? If that's the case you may end up with neither in the end.

typical chic response....you forget he still gets laid so its a win

QFT

Yeah, losing her in the end would be devastating. :roll:

[arcilite]

I thought about it more, theres just too many ways this can blow up in my face, so I dont think I will do anything. Because I also have a little history with this girls' sister (thats another story in itself) haha.

Just not worth the headaches it may cause I think

[Bossman641]

Not worth it. Not cool. If I was said guy, I would hit you with a pipe.

You would clean your own pipes thinking about it. Big difference.

Haha

[arcilite]

You guys impress me. I thought for sure someone would say 'we need pics of her first before we can answer'

[Freak Out]

Always take the chance man....that's my man law. You owe this guy nothing...you owe yourself the shot at happiness. I found my soul mate in a similar situation many years ago.

[Jimx29]

the only man law that I heard bud claims was "do NOT fruit the beer"............oh how times change

[Zool]

Always take the chance man....that's my man law. You owe this guy nothing...you owe yourself the shot at happiness. I found my soul mate in a similar situation many years ago.

Exactly. If this dude was a friend you talk to a few times a week and hang out with often she's off limits. The sister part just adds some extra spice to the equation.

[Harlan Huckleby]

if you care about your friend, you are not going to chase after some tail that will screw with your friendship.

If you have feelings for the woman, all bets are off - alls fair in love and war.

you don't need any advice, you already know what you are gonna do. I'm guessing beaver hunt.

[MadScientist]

Look, you don't see the guy much, so it's not like she's going to be in his face by being with you. If it doesn't end well with her, you can always commiserate with him about what a bitch she is. If it does work out, just remember, your bird in a bush is worth, well, a hell of a lot.

[GrnBay007]

Wonder how different the responses would be if the question was presented by a female wanting to date her ex-bf's friend? :idea: :P

[MadScientist]

Wonder how different the responses would be if the question was presented by a female wanting to date her ex-bf's friend? :idea: :P
Well for one the number of responses would be fewer, because there aren't as many lady rats here, and only a woman can figure out what goes on in a woman's mind.

[bobblehead]

Always take the chance man....that's my man law. You owe this guy nothing...you owe yourself the shot at happiness. I found my soul mate in a similar situation many years ago.

thats another issue, be honest with yourself...are you the marrying type at this point in your life?? If so take a shot if you really click...if not, you can find fun tail without pissing off the friend...even if you have drifted apart a bit.

[sheepshead]

Tell him you're gonna call her. While it may start as a nice piece of ass, it may lead somewhere. I think she's fair game. Just let everyone know the deal. How old is your friend?

[bobblehead]

Wonder how different the responses would be if the question was presented by a female wanting to date her ex-bf's friend? :idea: :P

I would tell you to put out first and then see where it leads.

[3irty1]

Its easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission. Tell him afterward. He'll appreciate the honesty and maybe even understand if she's a tractor beam of hotness.

I'm not sure but I think it also matters:

1. If it was the gal or your friend that ended things a year ago
2. If either of them have dated anybody since

[Harlan Huckleby]

Its easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission. Tell him afterward. He'll appreciate the honesty

honesty? :lol: weasle-honesty maybe.

[3irty1]

Its easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission. Tell him afterward. He'll appreciate the honesty

honesty? :lol: weasle-honesty maybe.

In this situation he is looking for not-feel-guilty-honesty not look-out-for-my-pseudo-college-buddys-feelings-honesty.

[hoosier]

Its easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission. Tell him afterward. He'll appreciate the honesty

honesty? :lol: weasle-honesty maybe.

In this situation he is looking for not-feel-guilty-honesty not look-out-for-my-pseudo-college-buddys-feelings-honesty.

This is exactly the kind of moral dilemma that alcohol was invented to resolve.

[MadtownPacker]

This is exactly the kind of moral dilemma that alcohol was invented to resolve.Ahahahahaha!! Best answer of the bunch.

I agree with those that say do what you gotta do. I guess my only question would be if you are OK if you where the friend and your homie was dating your ex. I wouldn't give a damn but others might.

BTW- Great thread. A RR original for sure.

[GoPackGo]

You care what your friend thinks so.....
If your friend is:
single and not over it-stay away from this chic until he's over it
single and over it- giddyup take the chic out
in a new relationship and not over it-stay away from this chic until he's over it
in a new relationship and over it-giddyup take this chic out

[Deputy Nutz]

Well you haven't seen the dude for 6 months so I don't think if he decided to dump you as a friend you wouldn't be to upset.

If you are friends with this check then why do you just want to fuck and go? Not a big deal if you want to, but you could get out of this clean if it was someone that you had a long term commitment with.

I say fuck her and then worry about it.

[arcilite]

Here is my gameplan:


1. i told my guy friend I'm hanging out with this girl. So now I have that base covered and never 'lied'.

2. I wont try to just get her drunk and work my charm.

4. Its not officially a 'date' but I think we both know its more than just 'two friends hanging out innocently'.

3. I won't be on offense making any advances...but I also won't play any defense and allow anything to happen. haha.

I will see how this goes.

[Cheesehead Craig]

Good move telling your friend. If he has any objections, he should be saying them now. If he doesn't say anything, then all bets are off.

[arcilite]

update!


We got drunk and hooked up on new years.


lol oops

[RashanGary]

She was probably lonely for the holiday and preplanned so she wouldn't be companionless for the New Year festivities. You took that need for companionship and turned it into something much better.

You have done well, young arcilite. We, the men, solute you.

Fucking pig.

[arcilite]

She was probably lonely for the holiday and preplanned so she wouldn't be companionless for the New Year festivities. You took that need for companionship and turned it into something much better.

You have done well, young arcilite. We, the men, solute you.

Fucking pig.

I felt like a man in the morning because last year on New Years eve I hooked up with her little sister.

[Freak Out]

She was probably lonely for the holiday and preplanned so she wouldn't be companionless for the New Year festivities. You took that need for companionship and turned it into something much better.

You have done well, young arcilite. We, the men, solute you.

Fucking pig.

I felt like a man in the morning because last year on New Years eve I hooked up with her little sister. :five:

[arcilite]

Thought I would give everyone an update on this.

I don't talk to my friend that I mentioned in the first post. I don't think we have spoken with each other in over a year.

I still talk to the girl almost daily, we are pretty good friends. I could never date her, but we do hook up from time to time when we hang out.

There is some drama because I live with a girl (just friends...actually...she might be worthy of a thread herself), and the girl I live with and the girl this thread is about do not like each other at all. It is amusing.

But, in hindsight I made the correct decisions. Don't regret anything.

I am awesome.