RIP Martina Anna

[Tarlam!]

You always complained that I hung around this place. I told you that I had too much personal interface at work and just needed to shut down here.

Now, you're dead. You had a terrible accident. You were sick. You didn't take your medicine, and now...

Look, Martina, I was a lousy husband. I take full blame. I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am. I let you down.

I have taken your body back to Vienna and you will be buried in Aspern with your mother and father. Walter, Leopold and AnneMarie agreed. I have organized your favourite songs to be sung live.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uJA5DkxQoU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wEwlSyd7DH4&feature=related

I made sure your coffin is good, but not expensive, just like we agreed, when we were happier.

I will take care of our son and daughter.

I am so sorry I was such a jerk. I could have saved you. I didn't.

I hope you have now, finally, found peace where you are. I hope you can forgive me. I hope our children will one day forgive me.

Martina, goodbye.


MAD - Please see that she gets this.

[Tarlam!]

Dear Rats, sorry, but I needed to share it with you.

[GrnBay007]

Sorry for your loss Tarlam.

[th87]

So sorry for your loss.

[sheepshead]

Your wife is dead? Really? That's tragic...

[Tarlam!]

Your wife is dead? Really? That's tragic...

Yes. She was hit by a train. At first, we thought it was suicide, but we've since pieced together the puzzle and realized it was a horrible accident.

It's my fault. I should have been more aware that her condition went south. I should have saved her. I was too late.

[Oscar]

I'm truly sorry brother. Stay strong. I realize that there are several miles between us but, let me know if there's anything I can do.

[Tarlam!]

I'm truly sorry brother. Stay strong. I realize that there are several miles between us but, let me know if there's anything I can do.

Listen to the songs and maybe light a candle and say a prayer, Jeff.

She hated this place, cause I was always here. But if a few Rats would honour her in her death, I'm sure she would understand my passion for the place.

[BallHawk]

So sorry for your loss, Tar. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[sheepshead]

This is terrible man. Is it time to move to Wisconsin?

[MadtownPacker]

So sorry to hear this Aussie. My sincerest condolences for this terrible loss. My thoughts are with you and your children.

[bobblehead]

Sorry to hear it tarlam. But remember, you most honor those that you loved by moving forward...never forgetting, but not dwelling to the point you ruin your life too.

[Fosco33]

Tarlam-

Those are beautiful songs - I hadn't heard of the first but my wife thought it was touching.

It's best not to place blame in situations like this - I've lost 2 best friends in the past 2 years and while it's never easy and people will try to say all the right things you just have to deal with it the best you can. Be strong for your children, share and cherish the memories and all things are possible.

Very sorry for your loss

[Partial]

I'm very sorry for your loss. Make sure that you stay strong for your kids during this. They'll need your support Tar!!

[retailguy]

Will add you and your kids to my prayer list. Well, actually your kids, you've never left it... My thoughts are with you during this time. My sincere condolences Tar!

[Tarlam!]

Thank you all. Please, if you find a candle and light it, say a small prayer for her, I would be so appreciative. Even a small candle.

And, please, listen to her songs. She loved them. My kids and I made fun of her over those songs. She defended them, though.

I can't stop crying. I just can't believe this.

[Kiwon]

Tarlam, what tragic news!

I pray that through this time of pain and devastating loss that you and your children will become closer as a family than ever before.

Don't try to suppress the pain, the emotion, express it. You can't control it, but with time you can learn to manage it.

Your wife is gone but your precious children remain with lives filled with hope and promise. Live for them and be the father that your wife would have wanted you to be.

Most importantly, remember that you are not alone. There is a loving God in Heaven that knows about loss as well. He also knows how to comfort the grieving.

I pray that you will take solace in the truth of God’s Word;

“Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:6-7)

“Let all who seek You rejoice and be glad in You; And let those who love Your salvation say continually, "Let God be magnified." But I am afflicted and needy; Hasten to me, O God! You are my help and my deliverer; O LORD, do not delay.” (Psalm 70:4-5)

“But You, O GOD, the Lord, deal kindly with me for Your name's sake; Because Your lovingkindness is good, deliver me; For I am afflicted and needy, And my heart is wounded within me.” (Psalm 109:21-22)

And Jesus promised,

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.” (John 14:27)

“These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

[Charles Woodson]

T, im sorry i dont even know what you must be going through now, ill keep ya'll in my thoughts and prayers

[Iron Mike]

I am so sorry I was such a jerk. I could have saved you. I didn't.


I'm having a hard time believing that this could be true. :(

[MJZiggy]

It wasn't your job to monitor. You shouldn't have seen it. It just happened. Accidents are accidents because they're unintentional.

I only knew the first song (and I know it well, it's a favorite of mine too). Tried to sing it for her. Hope she wasn't too offended...

"But boy, you've got a prayer in Memphis..."

Love you, Sweet.

[Bretsky]

my most sincere condolences; thoughts and prayers are with you

[oregonpackfan]

[quote="sheepshead"tragic...



It's my fault. I should have been more aware that her condition went south. I should have saved her. I was too late.[/quote]

I am saddened by your loss, Tarlam.

The last thing you should do is wallow in "Survivor Guilt." We cannot be at every place at every time for our loved ones.

A well-known 12-step group uses the phrase "Shit happens." Sometimes bad things happen to us of which we bear no fault or responsibility.

It is most unfortunate this "Shit" has happened to you.

[Badgerinmaine]

Tarlam, I am stunned and sorry for your loss. Please be kind to yourself though all of this. I will be thinking of and praying for you and your family. By the way, the first song my wife and I danced to as a married couple was Marc Cohn's "True Companion".
Peace, my Packer pal. May God's love and warmth come to you and help ease your pain.

[Tarlam!]

My kids and I are now back in Germany after the funeral services were held last Thursday.

It was a nice service and about 50 family and friends turned out. There were a lot of tears. It was an emotional time. It was difficult for me to fathom that the body inside the coffin bore my children, wore my ring, had gone through 15 years of my life at my side and that I'd never see her again. The reality is only now starting to set in.

My kids and I visited her grave the next day to see all the wreaths laid out. I think she'd be satisfied. Austrians have a real thing about funerals; it's almost a death cult. My wife was Austrian.

The 8 hour drive home was therapeutic and I was able to get my kids to laugh again. It was the first time in 2 weeks that I'd heard them laugh. It was a free kind of laugh, not forced or false.

We got home around 10 PM last night and my daughter and her best friend put on some make up and went down town. (I know that sounds like a young age, but, this is the norm here. It's very safe).

Today, my son will hang out with his girlfriend.

I plan on watching the game to morrow night. I have a job interview in Paris on Monday and in Zurich Friday.

Things are returning to "normal".

Thanks to all Rats for your support and encouragement through this time either openly on this thread or via the PMs you sent me. It meant and means a lot to me.

Thank You All!

[Kiwon]

God bless you, Tarlam.

I will continue to keep you and your family in my prayers.

Good luck with the job interviews.

[Badgerinmaine]

I'll echo Kiwon's exact words.

[packinpatland]

You're a man among men.
Good luck with the interviews.

[GBRulz]

I've been kinda MIA...so just reading this now.

I'm so sorry, Tar. You are in my thoughts and prayers.