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View Full Version : Tank Johnson finds his NFL home



Patler
04-08-2009, 09:30 AM
Where else? The Bengals signed him.:

http://www.nfl.com/news/story?id=09000d5d80fa8a50&template=without-video-with-comments&confirm=true

Fritz
04-08-2009, 12:43 PM
In the article above, this: "In all, the Bengals had a run of 10 player arrests in a 14-month span."

I was frankly disappointed - they couldn't keep up with one-a-month?

I imagine their scouting department is working furiously on the draft. Here's what their preliminary draft board might look like:

1. Andre Smith - Strengths: team suspensions, left combine early, manboobs, immaturity. Weaknesses: lacks arrests, seems to want to learn. Warning: may be a nice guy.

2. Michael Crabtree - Strengths: cocky, runs mouth. Poor football intelligence. Weaknesses: again, lacks legal trouble. Unable to expand his game from merely team violations to violations of law.

3. Richard Jones - Strengths: Jones is moving up our draft board quickly after recent arrests for B & E, stalking, and discharging a firearm in a pblic place. Locker room cancer. Peed on ex-girlfriend's chihuahua. Weaknesses: Willingness to reform. Also, takes too much responsibility for actions.

LP
04-08-2009, 01:02 PM
Two questions.

Do the Bengals keep a parole/probation officer on staff? :roll:

Will Michael Vick be next?

Guiness
04-08-2009, 01:27 PM
this is one of those 'don't know whether to laugh or cry moments'

ok, he has kept his nose clean for a while, and he probably came cheap. Still.

cpk1994
04-08-2009, 01:47 PM
In the article above, this: "In all, the Bengals had a run of 10 player arrests in a 14-month span."

I was frankly disappointed - they couldn't keep up with one-a-month?

I imagine their scouting department is working furiously on the draft. Here's what their preliminary draft board might look like:

1. Andre Smith - Strengths: team suspensions, left combine early, manboobs, immaturity. Weaknesses: lacks arrests, seems to want to learn. Warning: may be a nice guy.

2. Michael Crabtree - Strengths: cocky, runs mouth. Poor football intelligence. Weaknesses: again, lacks legal trouble. Unable to expand his game from merely team violations to violations of law.

3. Richard Jones - Strengths: Jones is moving up our draft board quickly after recent arrests for B & E, stalking, and discharging a firearm in a pblic place. Locker room cancer. Peed on ex-girlfriend's chihuahua. Weaknesses: Willingness to reform. Also, takes too much responsibility for actions.

I never knew manboobs was such a strength to have. I learn something new about the NFL every day. :lol:

Partial
04-08-2009, 03:18 PM
In the article above, this: "In all, the Bengals had a run of 10 player arrests in a 14-month span."

I was frankly disappointed - they couldn't keep up with one-a-month?

I imagine their scouting department is working furiously on the draft. Here's what their preliminary draft board might look like:

1. Andre Smith - Strengths: team suspensions, left combine early, manboobs, immaturity. Weaknesses: lacks arrests, seems to want to learn. Warning: may be a nice guy.

2. Michael Crabtree - Strengths: cocky, runs mouth. Poor football intelligence. Weaknesses: again, lacks legal trouble. Unable to expand his game from merely team violations to violations of law.

3. Richard Jones - Strengths: Jones is moving up our draft board quickly after recent arrests for B & E, stalking, and discharging a firearm in a pblic place. Locker room cancer. Peed on ex-girlfriend's chihuahua. Weaknesses: Willingness to reform. Also, takes too much responsibility for actions.

:lol: :lol: :lol: potm

mraynrand
04-08-2009, 03:35 PM
I never knew manboobs was such a strength to have. I learn something new about the NFL every day. :lol:

"Did someone mention me?"
http://i.a.cnn.net/si/2007/writers/bill_syken/01/25/scorecard.daily/p1_syken.jpg

Fritz
04-08-2009, 04:39 PM
In the article above, this: "In all, the Bengals had a run of 10 player arrests in a 14-month span."

I was frankly disappointed - they couldn't keep up with one-a-month?

I imagine their scouting department is working furiously on the draft. Here's what their preliminary draft board might look like:

1. Andre Smith - Strengths: team suspensions, left combine early, manboobs, immaturity. Weaknesses: lacks arrests, seems to want to learn. Warning: may be a nice guy.

2. Michael Crabtree - Strengths: cocky, runs mouth. Poor football intelligence. Weaknesses: again, lacks legal trouble. Unable to expand his game from merely team violations to violations of law.

3. Richard Jones - Strengths: Jones is moving up our draft board quickly after recent arrests for B & E, stalking, and discharging a firearm in a pblic place. Locker room cancer. Peed on ex-girlfriend's chihuahua. Weaknesses: Willingness to reform. Also, takes too much responsibility for actions.

I never knew manboobs was such a strength to have. I learn something new about the NFL every day. :lol:

Waldo's got nothin' on me.

Guiness
04-08-2009, 05:03 PM
Florida State's Rod Owens was arrested in Tallahassee this past week-end on a DUI charge after blowing nearly double the state's legal standard of .08.

Maybe this guy will come out early, and the Bengals can take a late round flyer on him? It's just DUI, but it could be promising.

I'm sure they keeping an eye on Ohio St.'s Eugene Clifford who was arraigned on two counts of assault last summer...but he just finished his freshman year, so they'll have to wait.

Fritz
04-08-2009, 06:05 PM
Guiness, if you're looking for work, I bet the Bengals could find a spot for you on their scouting staff...

And by the way, Kwame Kilpatrick, ex-mayor of Detroit, is built like a flippin' linebacker. I wonder if Cinci would take a flyer on him?

SnakeLH2006
04-09-2009, 01:28 AM
In the article above, this: "In all, the Bengals had a run of 10 player arrests in a 14-month span."

I was frankly disappointed - they couldn't keep up with one-a-month?

I imagine their scouting department is working furiously on the draft. Here's what their preliminary draft board might look like:

1. Andre Smith - Strengths: team suspensions, left combine early, manboobs, immaturity. Weaknesses: lacks arrests, seems to want to learn. Warning: may be a nice guy.

2. Michael Crabtree - Strengths: cocky, runs mouth. Poor football intelligence. Weaknesses: again, lacks legal trouble. Unable to expand his game from merely team violations to violations of law.

3. Richard Jones - Strengths: Jones is moving up our draft board quickly after recent arrests for B & E, stalking, and discharging a firearm in a pblic place. Locker room cancer. Peed on ex-girlfriend's chihuahua. Weaknesses: Willingness to reform. Also, takes too much responsibility for actions.

I never knew manboobs was such a strength to have. I learn something new about the NFL every day. :lol:

Hey, Snake coinphrased that term for Andre Smith a month ago, bro. I want a royalty check or at least $5 sent to me via PayPal. C'mon...at least give the props. :cry:

Guiness
04-09-2009, 12:27 PM
Bengals CB Hall charged with drunken driving

http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/story/11608723
http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=4054271

:wow: :beat: :huh: :whist: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

mission
04-09-2009, 12:33 PM
Too funny Fritz!! :lol:

Gunakor
04-09-2009, 12:34 PM
Bengals CB Hall charged with drunken driving

http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/story/11608723
http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=4054271

:wow: :beat: :huh: :whist: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

But hey, it's the first time a Bengal has been criminally charged with anything for one whole year. Give them credit, it's a huge jump forward from the 10 in 12 months or whatever that preceeded it.

DonHutson
04-09-2009, 01:32 PM
I imagine their scouting department is working furiously on the draft.

I'm convinced the Bengals "scouting department" consists of a fifteen year old kid who prints out a bunch of mock drafts the night before the draft. The kid recommends drunks and lowlifes because they agree to buy him beer.

Packers4Ever
04-09-2009, 09:51 PM
In the article above, this: "In all, the Bengals had a run of 10 player arrests in a 14-month span."

I was frankly disappointed - they couldn't keep up with one-a-month?

I imagine their scouting department is working furiously on the draft. Here's what their preliminary draft board might look like:

1. Andre Smith - Strengths: team suspensions, left combine early, manboobs, immaturity. Weaknesses: lacks arrests, seems to want to learn. Warning: may be a nice guy.

2. Michael Crabtree - Strengths: cocky, runs mouth. Poor football intelligence. Weaknesses: again, lacks legal trouble. Unable to expand his game from merely team violations to violations of law.

3. Richard Jones - Strengths: Jones is moving up our draft board quickly after recent arrests for B & E, stalking, and discharging a firearm in a pblic place. Locker room cancer. Peed on ex-girlfriend's chihuahua. Weaknesses: Willingness to reform. Also, takes too much responsibility for actions.

:lol: :lol: :lol: potm


Fritz, these are great! Can you issue the next group of player strengths and weaknesses by next Monday? Did you have them posted in GBPG or
Milw.JS ?
:lol: