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mraynrand
06-30-2011, 11:04 AM
Mraynrand: Good morning everyone, today I am interviewing Josh Smedball, Star Magazines' top Cellulite photographer. Hi Josh!

Josh Smedball: Hi Mraynrand

M: So Josh, how did you get into the exciting world of cellulite photography?

JS: Well, it was really just dumb luck actually. I was scuba diving in Maui with one of those disposable underwater cameras and I thought I had found a rare Beluga whale, but it turned out to be Kirstie Alley! I took some quick snaps, contacted the Star, and the rest was history, as they say.

M: So those first shots were successful?

JS: You bet! The first two they used right away on a cover with a story they concocted about how Ted Danson and Vinnie Barbarino were trying to get her help.

M: You mean John Travolta, right.

JS: No, Ted Danson and Vinnie Barbarino. I thought I was clear about that.

M: But Vinnie Barbarino is just a character John Travolta played on "Welcome Back Kotter."

JS: No shit? Really? Wow, live and learn I guess. But I like both Vinnie Barbarino and John Travolta. So win, win, right?

M: Sure. So what about the third picture?

JS: Oh that. It went on a cover a few years later - you know, one of those mags where they show the ass and ask you to guess the celeb it goes with.

M: You mean like "Which celeb has dimpled up?"

JS: Yeah, you got it. If it dimples, it's my domain.

M: So what's the best part about you job?

JS: I'd have to say the food. You wouldn't believe what some of these guy throw out in their trash. That's usually where I wait to take their pictures and I'm telling you, some of these guys have trash cans that are better than most 5 star restaurants.

M: And the worst?

JS: Dumpsters and the Federine guy. He kicked the shit out of me once. Well, Vince Rhames did too, but he was a gentleman about it. He let me take off my glasses first.

http://bmacniel.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/britney.jpg

M: What about the dumpsters?

JS: Oh, I hang out there to get the best pictures of celebs coming out of restaurants.

M: Who is your most surprising cellulite picture.

JS: It's a toss up between Jennifer Love Hewitt and Maria Sharapova. I mean, when my editor told me to go snap Sharapova, I was all like "Like, boss, there is no way that girl has cellulite," and he was all like "Oh, yes she does, Bitch." Either way, I have to bring back the picture. But damn if he wasn't right. That girl has Crisco leggings.

M: Crisco leggings?

JS: Yep. That's insider terminology. It means they have a layer of fat. And it's surprising to find it in conditioned athletes, but they get it just the same.

M: And what about Jennifer Love Hewitt?

JS: Well, I was expecting it to be really hard. I was even all geared up to have to photoshop in say Kate Winslet's thighs, but JLH did not disappoint. Wow did she balloon up.

M: Do you ever find anything about the business degrading?

JS: Is that a trick question? Sometimes I don't care for the beat downs, but the money is great. There is one downside though.

M: And that is?

JS: I notice the cellulite everywhere. My girlfriend is starting to dimple. That's just gross.

-fin

SkinBasket
06-30-2011, 01:38 PM
You're weird.

Little Whiskey
07-01-2011, 12:06 AM
You're weird.

wow

Deputy Nutz
07-01-2011, 12:15 AM
good

Little Whiskey
07-01-2011, 12:43 AM
good

cellulite?

HowardRoark
07-01-2011, 10:34 AM
Does it say "Love kills slowly" on her ass?

Freak Out
07-01-2011, 10:54 AM
Looks like it.

mraynrand
07-01-2011, 05:51 PM
JS: Hey Mraynrand, be careful what you wish for...

http://images2.fanpop.com/images/photos/7000000/Mena-mena-suvari-7013742-891-1222.jpg