7 Pound Turkey Challenge

[SkinBasket]

When is Thanksgiving?

[mraynrand]

every day I don't wake up dead

[SkinBasket]

Well, I figure I need to get in shape any time fall rolls around because I'm reminded of Partial's infamous and totally edited thread that started it all. Since someone dropped that he's now in training to become a ninja, and considering the previous threats he's made on my life, I need to outfit my body to offer any kind of response that would save my life if I meet him on the street.

So, to meet this monumental challenge, I've decided to lose 7 or 12 pounds by Thanksgiving. I worked out several times a week during the summer, sometimes pushing myself to a moderate level of exhaustion. The result was a loss of twenty pounds. Granted, I was a fat fuck. Anyway, after vacation, I decided to let my body rest. Two months later, I'm ready to prepare for that final battle, which will inevitably come.

Weight: 201.4
Breakfast: Peanut butter and jelly on some bread with nuts in it. Milk.
Lunch: Water.
Diner: Big Mac, double cheeseburger, large french fry, tortilla chips with jalepeno cheese dip, a slice of a cookie cake and a bottle of wine.
Excercise: none

I will be using some new techniques this time, including a testosterone supplement, which is mostly just zinc and B vitamins to make you feel like you've got bigger balls, No-Xplode, and whey protein.

[HowardRoark]

When will you determine if it's 7 or 12; I need to know whether or not I want to engage in this thread.

[Freak Out]

So...just to clarify..did you have a Big Mac and a double cheese-burger, or a Big Mac which is technically a double cheese-burger? Also...what is a "cookie cake"? Is that just a pet name for your wife?

[Freak Out]

If I decide to join in the challenge can I lie about my starting weight?

[Little Whiskey]

Must you do your squats past 90 degrees in order to compete in the challenge?

[Little Whiskey]

must all weight loss be tracked on an Apple product?

[HowardRoark]

I just hurt my shoulder.

I'm out.

[hoosier]

I recommend timing your pig-outs earlier in the day when your metabolism is still relatively high and you still have miles to go before you sleep. You might even be able to squeeze in an extra fishwich from the Milwaukee River if you go that route.

[George Cumby]

WTF are you all talking about?

[SkinBasket]

So...just to clarify..did you have a Big Mac and a double cheese-burger, or a Big Mac which is technically a double cheese-burger? Also...what is a "cookie cake"? Is that just a pet name for your wife?

Both. No use eating McDonalds if you only half-ass it. Also, you may start with a "relative weight." You may call it your own Zero, FOZero. You can then refer to your progress, or lack thereof, in terms of FOZero+3, or FOZero-5. Then we won't mock you. At all. Because we are all responsible, supportive teammates who offer advice on things like squats and lifting needlessly heavy freeweights in a repetitive manner with no real-world equivalent.

[Zool]

WTF are you all talking about?

It's a yearly thread. Weigh yourself, put up what you ate during the day and what exercise you did. Putting it into writing makes you realize how much you eat and how little you exercise and might help change the trend.

[SkinBasket]

Putting it into writing makes you realize how much you eat and how little you exercise and might help change the trend.

Whatever. I just don't want to die when Partial finds me.

[Zool]

Whatever. I just don't want to die when Partial finds me.

He can dead lift your body weight with ease. You're screwed. Literally and figuratively.

[SkinBasket]

I recommend timing your pig-outs earlier in the day when your metabolism is still relatively high.

I only eat a lot when I drink, so that would require me to become a daytime drunk. I see the benefits of such a move, but there might also be a negative effect on my workouts.

200.8
breakfast: a banana
lunch: blueberry bagel with honey and butter, water, and a handful of combos.
diner: bacon apple sandwich with mayo, onion, and provolone on pane toscano bread, water, and pecan ice cream.
exercise: 1.5 mile variable speed circuit, 60 balance ball sit-ups.

First time in a couple months that I used NO-Xplode, so I was up half the night in a delirious half-sleep, alternating between casually molesting my wife, massaging my calf craps, and fighting off heartburn.

[SkinBasket]

I just hurt my shoulder.

I'm out.

If you're really out, you need to call someone a cunt first.

[HowardRoark]

First time in a couple months that I used NO-Xplode, so I was up half the night in a delirious half-sleep, alternating between casually molesting my wife, massaging my calf craps, and fighting off heartburn.

Your wife is one lucky little lady.

What's with the noticeable absence of "cheese cubes" or whatever they were called?

[HowardRoark]

Alright, I'm back in. I'm running a 10 mile race in a week, but feel like puking everytime I get to around 6 miles.

[hoosier]

Alright, I'm back in. I'm running a 10 mile race in a week, but feel like puking everytime I get to around 6 miles.

That does not bode well for miles 7-10 next week. But with any luck you will have the wind at your back and not a head wind.

[George Cumby]

It's a yearly thread. Weigh yourself, put up what you ate during the day and what exercise you did. Putting it into writing makes you realize how much you eat and how little you exercise and might help change the trend.

Gotcha'. Thanks.

I won't play. I'm a skinny fugger that works out 3-4 days a week (otherwise I go bat-shit crazy) who can eat everything in sight without breaking 160#.

In other words, no fun and probably worth your hate.

[SkinBasket]

Your wife is one lucky little lady.

Sometimes I punish her by seducing her in the wee hours of the morning when I know she has to get up early. Last night was mostly just confused groping as part of my half dreams. But, yes, she is lucky.


What's with the noticeable absence of "cheese cubes" or whatever they were called?

Been awhile since I had the cubes. Excellent call.

[SkinBasket]

In other words, no fun and probably worth your hate.

Then you have to participate. Part of the fun is the exchange of failed and successful ideas. That was the part Partial couldn't handle and led to highly predictable - actually predicted, injuries and then lots of anger and insults directed at the very people who tried to help him.

We all welcome a peek into what makes your routine work. It's a welcome refreshment from our failures.

[swede]

You young pups and your high mileage. I'm finally running a mile out there in the dark streets of early morning, and that's with the unfair assistance of being dragged by a pair of golden doodles and a husky-lab mix that considers any increase in pace an invitation to start the first leg of the Iditarod. Thank God for the anonymity of 5 am or I would be more embarrassed than I am of the lopsided, mucus-gargling, shambling mess of a road show I call my morning run

Do any of you run in 5K, 10K events? I ask because I should be ready for the upcoming Turkey Trot, theoretically, but I am anxious about the possible reactions of any of the walkers who pass me as I am running. At the least I fear that I will excite mere disgust in my fellow Turkey Trotters when they hear my wheezing and gasping, and, at the worst, I fear someone will call the EMT's and I'll be tackled and gurnied off the course before I can settle into my 12 minute mile pace.

Would I be the only obnoxiously loud gasp-breather in the race, or is that par for the course at the tail end of these community races?

[HowardRoark]

You young pups and your high mileage. I'm finally running a mile out there in the dark streets of early morning, and that's with the unfair assistance of being dragged by a pair of golden doodles and a husky-lab mix that considers any increase in pace an invitation to start the first leg of the Iditarod. Thank God for the anonymity of 5 am or I would be more embarrassed than I am of the lopsided, mucus-gargling, shambling mess of a road show I call my morning run

Do any of you run in 5K, 10K events? I ask because I should be ready for the upcoming Turkey Trot, theoretically, but I am anxious about the possible reactions of any of the walkers who pass me as I am running. At the least I fear that I will excite mere disgust in my fellow Turkey Trotters when they hear my wheezing and gasping, and, at the worst, I fear someone will call the EMT's and I'll be tackled and gurnied off the course before I can settle into my 12 minute mile pace.

Would I be the only obnoxiously loud gasp-breather in the race, or is that par for the course at the tail end of these community races?

Not sure where you live; it’s either on a farm in Blue Earth county or somewhere in the vicinity of the Fox River Valley…….but my take on those Turkey Runs is that they are so damn crowded (Minneapolis) that the pack never gets above a 12 minute mile pace anyway. You should be fine.

[Freak Out]

I don't run at all anymore....it just hurts to much. I ride both road and MTBs a bunch...and then ski a load here in winters. My problem is I don't do it enough to balance out my drinking and eating so I have to kick it up a notch. I'm not giving up beer.....
I am now doing some cardio everyday (no skipping) plus walking with my wife every night....and am also hitting some weights as well. I broke my bike trainer so may buy a spin bike off of Craigslist to put in front of the TV for game days and such. We'll see.......

[George Cumby]

Then you have to participate. Part of the fun is the exchange of failed and successful ideas. That was the part Partial couldn't handle and led to highly predictable - actually predicted, injuries and then lots of anger and insults directed at the very people who tried to help him.

We all welcome a peek into what makes your routine work. It's a welcome refreshment from our failures.

lol! Thanks for the invite, I appreciate that.

40-something

152#

Breakfast: bacon, egg, cheese burrito

Lunch: beef burrito

PM Snack: beef burrito

Dinner: dunno' yet

Lunch workout:

"The Bear" (barbell complex):

Hang-power clean
Front Squat
Push Press
Back Squat
Push Press
Run through one rep of each movement 7x.

Repeat five times, increasing the load each round.

1- 45#
2 - 65#
3 - 75# (Using the "El Gordo" fat bar)
4- 75# El Gordo
5 - 75# El Gordo

HR probably spiked at 160 at the end of round #5. Shoulders and forearms smoked. Literally shaking at end of the workout.

If I am annoying....... if I get too annoying, tell me to go away :-)

[SkinBasket]

If I am annoying....... if I get too annoying, tell me to go away :-)

Madtown should let you read the unedited version of the first Turkey thread. Then you would know just how unannoying you are. Speaking of which, are you Mexican, or do you just love you some burrito?

[SkinBasket]

201.5
Breakfast: whey protein, banana, honey, milk, cayenne pepper shake
Lunch: stouffers cheesy spaghetti bake, milk, and a hunk of bread with butter
Diner: turkey balls with buttered green beans, water, and a bowl of ie cream
Exercise: 1.5 circuit de skinbasket, light shoulder chest and back work.

[HowardRoark]

6.53 miles. No puking.

[Zool]

Going to attempt to start running again this weekend. Knee surgeries and arthritis be damned.

205
Breakfast: Oatmeal
Lunch: Jambalaya
Mid-day snack: popcorn
Dinner: Beercan chicken, baked potato with butter and asparagus
2 glasses red wine

[mraynrand]

213 pounds
Breakfast: Frosted Flakes
Lunch: Ham and cheese sandwich, Cherry Coke, 3 bananas
Dinner: Turkey burger, Pumpkin Ale, Bush's baked beans, spinach salad
Exercise: scraping and inhaling lead paint in the basement.
Snack: box of sweettarts

[HowardRoark]

scraping and inhaling lead paint in the basement.


Explains a lot.

[mraynrand]

Explains a lot.

Indeed
http://www.highdefdiscnews.com/screenshots/tommy_boy_1.png

[SkinBasket]

Something tells me George is looking at us all right now and feeling pretty damned good about himself.

[mraynrand]

When will you determine if it's 7 or 12; I need to know whether or not I want to engage in this thread.

I almost lose 7 pounds every morning after my first sip of coffee. I'd like to get down to 200-205 so I can increase my running pace. want to get back to 6-6:30/mile pace by May.


Skin, who is George?

[George Cumby]

I knew Rand had me on "ignore".

150 ish

Breakfast: bacon, sausage, egg and cheese burrito
Lunch: Ham and cheese sammich and a diet pepsi
snack: small bag o' almonds
Dinner: Cheeseburger and salad

Didn't drink enough water today.

Workout:

Practice with bokken
climbed a tree
fast scramble up the boulder field behind the house

I'm glad you guys let me play.

The moment I start feeling good about myself b/c I'm a skinny fucker and you are cornfed types is the moment I want you to load a bar with 225 and ask me to bench it. Then we'll see who feels good about themselves :-D

[Deputy Nutz]

Stress is killing me. I went through 33 years without being stressed and now stress is eating me alive. I don't eat shit until 4:30 at night, I take one huge dump every day that I name after a forum member. Today was a Harlan because it was sort of runny.

230.4 and not feeling really all that good about myself even though I lose .36 pounds a day. I haven't worked out in a month.

[swede]

Stress is killing me. I went through 33 years without being stressed and now stress is eating me alive. I don't eat shit until 4:30 at night, I take one huge dump every day that I name after a forum member. Today was a Harlan because it was sort of runny.

230.4 and not feeling really all that good about myself even though I lose .36 pounds a day. I haven't worked out in a month.

You teaching now?

[mraynrand]

I knew Rand had me on "ignore".

nah, I'm just an idiot.

[SkinBasket]

203.5
banana/tuna & crackers, water
tomato soup, hunk of bread, milk
fish tacos with mango salsa, combos, potato chips, dark chocolate covered raisins, chocolate pretzels, vodka, red bull, and some lemon and lime juice

a nice 1/4 mile walk

[mraynrand]

214
frosted flakes
pbj sand, quesadilla
some sort of non-descript leftover meat thing with ground turkey - might have been stroganoff
2 bananas, juice
2.5 pots of french roast coffee
exercise: interminable bible study

[HowardRoark]

3 New Glarus Stagheads
I poisoned fish fry at Post Lake Inn (stay away!!)
Half bag of fresh cheese curds and ice cream cone

I think I lost 5 lbs this morning (see: fish fry)

[mraynrand]

Post Lake Inn - near Rhinelander? really?

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-_v_AfmUPxlE/T4ueAT2tY2I/AAAAAAAJlyM/-5JTPmshERk/s894/Post+Lake+Inn

[HowardRoark]

Yep, that's the poison center. Go to Wolff's instead. Too long of a wait with a 7 & 9 year old last night; they get tired after their second Manhattan.

[mraynrand]

Yep, that's the poison center. Go to Wolff's instead. Too long of a wait with a 7 & 9 year old last night; they get tired after their second Manhattan.

I think you get special seating/service if you come in on a snow machine. I will alert the authorities to your mishap. I have police/detective connections in Rhinelander. This will not stand.

Did you get any of the delicious PBR or Moldstyle. Chances are, that's what made you puke. That swill is only a fraction better than Grain Belt.

[wootah]

Does no one eat decent bread & jam for breakfast? You guys have some strange eating habits :)

We don't have scales in the house, so unfortunately I can't play along.

[MJZiggy]

Does no one eat decent bread & jam for breakfast? You guys have some strange eating habits :)

We don't have scales in the house, so unfortunately I can't play along.

I can't either. I have a scale here somewhere, but the batteries died a few years ago and I've never bothered to replace them. That said, yesterday I had cherry crepes, a chocolate truffle left over from when my friends were visiting in July, a small bowl of pho and a coffee cup full of ice cream. I walked around at the World Market grand opening where they moved into a space that three stores have failed in in the last few years. Not sure what makes businesses think they're different from the last one that failed.

[mraynrand]

Sat
213
B: Bacon,scrambled eggs with cheese, hashbrowns, juice, 12 grain toast with jam (so there, Wootah)
L: two of those Panera bagels with some sort of sugary cinnamon crust crapped on top, cream cheese
D: Thai food, half a plate, juice, wine, quarter glass- some sort of pino - watery but good
pot and half of french roast coffee
snack: albuterol
Exercise: 7.3 miles, 58 minutes - this gets any worse, and suicide is an option

[Freak Out]

Ziggy....you need to gain some weight...not lose any. Midget..... :)

[George Cumby]

150ish

fried eggs, bacon, french toast
random snacking for lunch
spaghetti with italian sausage and salad
four Lagunitas IPA's throughout the day

Exercise: random chores and prepping for the first winter storm of the season, minor argument with Wife, no blood shed

[GrnBay007]

Exercise: minor argument with Wife, no blood shed

Wheww! good thing! :)

If arguing counts as exercise everyone needs a TEEN in their house at all times! :)

[HowardRoark]

Exercise: 7.3 miles, 58 minutes - this gets any worse, and suicide is an option

I get to 8 minute miles and I celebrate. 6-7 minute miles is pretty damn fast.

[MJZiggy]

Ziggy....you need to gain some weight...not lose any. Midget..... :)

I've gained about 6 or 7 lbs. since I saw you last!

breakfast: slice of cinnamon coffee cake, decaf mocha
dinner: chicken breast stuffed with ricotta and tomato sauce and herbed orzo with capers.

Ran errands, walked the dog. Extra exercise trying to control the little deviant.

[mraynrand]

Extra exercise trying to control the little deviant.

new boyfriend?

[SkinBasket]

202.2
blueberry bagel with honey and milk
pulled pork and ham sandwiches, chex mix, taco dip and chips, cupcake, 2 cokes
popcorn, chips and cheese dip, red bull, vodka
off road racing, 1.5 mile run/jog/walk, pull-ups, sit ups

[mraynrand]

Sun
210
B: The wrath of God
L: Two bagels, banana
game: pizza, taco dip, Great Lakes Oktoberfest, Fat Squirrel
D: Stew with pasta
exercise: the demons, raking
snack: ice cream, heartburn

[SkinBasket]

taco dip

http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120725201223/community-sitcom/images/thumb/6/68/Somewhere_Out_There_-_Film_Version_-_An_American_Tail/400px-Somewhere_Out_There_-_Film_Version_-_An_American_Tail.jpg
Somewhere... Out there...

[HowardRoark]

Pot of French Roast Coffee
1 Oatmeal Chocolate chip cookie
1 piece apple crisp
8 mile run
2 chicken burritos
2 Great Northern Porters

no idea if I gained or lost

[George Cumby]

152

Fried eggs, bacon, hashbrowns,
1.5 grilled cheese and salami sammich, big glass of milk
chili and garlic bread
two Lagunitas IPA's
dessert: TBD

workout:

3 x 5 Bench Press with El Gordo

[Freak Out]

WTF over? I figured this was the thread to post this in. :)

October 25, 2012

Officer Held in Plot to Cook Women and Eat Them

By JOSEPH GOLDSTEIN

A New York police officer was arrested this week after he discussed cooking and eating female body parts, according to a criminal complaint.

The evidence against the officer, a six-year veteran of the New York Police Department, consists of e-mails and instant messages in which he was “discussing plans to kidnap, rape, torture, kill, cook and eat body parts of a number of women,” according to the complaint against the officer, Gilberto Valle. The Federal Bureau of Investigation arrested him on Wednesday in Queens.

The complaint suggests that Officer Valle, who worked in the 26th Precinct in Manhattan and lives in Forest Hills, Queens, never followed through on any of the acts he is accused of discussing. He was charged with federal kidnapping conspiracy, and is expected to appear in Federal District Court in Manhattan on Thursday afternoon. Officer Valle is married.

In one message to a co-conspirator, Officer Valle wrote that he was contemplating cooking a person “over a low heat” so as to “keep her alive as long as possible,” according to the complaint.

“The allegations in the complaint really need no description from us,” Mary E. Galligan, the F.B.I.'s acting assistant director, said in a statement. “They speak for themselves. It would be an understatement merely to say Valle’s own words and actions were shocking.”

The criminal complaint describes two separate episodes in which Officer Valle discussed abducting women. In each case it appears that the women knew the officer vaguely.

In an episode in February, Officer Valle sent an online message to another unnamed person in which he offered to kidnap a woman on the person’s behalf for a price: “$5,000 and she is all yours,” the officer wrote, according to the complaint.

“Just so that you know, she may be knocked out when I get her to you,” Officer Valle wrote, according to the criminal complaint. “I don’t know how long the solvent I am using will last but I have to knock her out to get her out of her apartment safely.”

Officer Valle appeared to be under the impression that the person he was communicating with intended to rape the woman, according to the criminal complaint.

“She will be alive,” he wrote. “It’s a short drive to you. I think I would rather not get involved in the rape. You paid for her. She is all yours and I don’t want to be tempted the next time I abduct a girl.”

Officer Valle also wrote that he would not budge on his $5,000 price: “Like I said this is very risky and will ruin my life if I am caught.”

While the complaint does not identify the woman in question, F.B.I. agents later learned that cellphone tracking devices indicated that Officer Valle had made or received phone calls on the block in Manhattan where the woman lived. When an F.B.I. agent interviewed the woman, she said she did not know Officer Valle well.

In a search of the officer’s computer, federal investigators discovered “files pertaining to at least 100 women,” according to the complaint.

“The F.B.I. has identified and interviewed 10 of these women, each of whom has confirmed to the F.B.I. that Valle is known to her,” the complaint said.

In the search, federal agents also discovered a document Officer Valle had created that appeared to be a “blueprint” for “abducting and cooking” another woman, according to the complaint, which redacts the name of the victim.

In one message from July 19, Officer Valle sent an instant message to a person described as a “co-conspirator,” indicating that he was meeting with the intended victim three days later, according to the complaint. The victim, who was later interviewed in October by the F.B.I., said she had met the officer that day “at a restaurant for lunch,” according to the complaint. What happened during or after the lunch was not disclosed.

[George Cumby]

WTF over? I figured this was the thread to post this in. :)

October 25, 2012

Officer Held in Plot to Cook Women and Eat Them

By JOSEPH GOLDSTEIN

A New York police officer was arrested this week after he discussed cooking and eating female body parts, according to a criminal complaint.

The evidence against the officer, a six-year veteran of the New York Police Department, consists of e-mails and instant messages in which he was “discussing plans to kidnap, rape, torture, kill, cook and eat body parts of a number of women,” according to the complaint against the officer, Gilberto Valle. The Federal Bureau of Investigation arrested him on Wednesday in Queens.

The complaint suggests that Officer Valle, who worked in the 26th Precinct in Manhattan and lives in Forest Hills, Queens, never followed through on any of the acts he is accused of discussing. He was charged with federal kidnapping conspiracy, and is expected to appear in Federal District Court in Manhattan on Thursday afternoon. Officer Valle is married.

In one message to a co-conspirator, Officer Valle wrote that he was contemplating cooking a person “over a low heat” so as to “keep her alive as long as possible,” according to the complaint.

“The allegations in the complaint really need no description from us,” Mary E. Galligan, the F.B.I.'s acting assistant director, said in a statement. “They speak for themselves. It would be an understatement merely to say Valle’s own words and actions were shocking.”

The criminal complaint describes two separate episodes in which Officer Valle discussed abducting women. In each case it appears that the women knew the officer vaguely.

In an episode in February, Officer Valle sent an online message to another unnamed person in which he offered to kidnap a woman on the person’s behalf for a price: “$5,000 and she is all yours,” the officer wrote, according to the complaint.

“Just so that you know, she may be knocked out when I get her to you,” Officer Valle wrote, according to the criminal complaint. “I don’t know how long the solvent I am using will last but I have to knock her out to get her out of her apartment safely.”

Officer Valle appeared to be under the impression that the person he was communicating with intended to rape the woman, according to the criminal complaint.

“She will be alive,” he wrote. “It’s a short drive to you. I think I would rather not get involved in the rape. You paid for her. She is all yours and I don’t want to be tempted the next time I abduct a girl.”

Officer Valle also wrote that he would not budge on his $5,000 price: “Like I said this is very risky and will ruin my life if I am caught.”

While the complaint does not identify the woman in question, F.B.I. agents later learned that cellphone tracking devices indicated that Officer Valle had made or received phone calls on the block in Manhattan where the woman lived. When an F.B.I. agent interviewed the woman, she said she did not know Officer Valle well.

In a search of the officer’s computer, federal investigators discovered “files pertaining to at least 100 women,” according to the complaint.

“The F.B.I. has identified and interviewed 10 of these women, each of whom has confirmed to the F.B.I. that Valle is known to her,” the complaint said.

In the search, federal agents also discovered a document Officer Valle had created that appeared to be a “blueprint” for “abducting and cooking” another woman, according to the complaint, which redacts the name of the victim.

In one message from July 19, Officer Valle sent an instant message to a person described as a “co-conspirator,” indicating that he was meeting with the intended victim three days later, according to the complaint. The victim, who was later interviewed in October by the F.B.I., said she had met the officer that day “at a restaurant for lunch,” according to the complaint. What happened during or after the lunch was not disclosed.

I don't get it. What was his exercise for that day?

[hoosier]

:-?
WTF over? I figured this was the thread to post this in. :)

October 25, 2012

Officer Held in Plot to Cook Women and Eat Them

By JOSEPH GOLDSTEIN

A New York police officer was arrested this week after he discussed cooking and eating female body parts, according to a criminal complaint.

The evidence against the officer, a six-year veteran of the New York Police Department, consists of e-mails and instant messages in which he was “discussing plans to kidnap, rape, torture, kill, cook and eat body parts of a number of women,” according to the complaint against the officer, Gilberto Valle. The Federal Bureau of Investigation arrested him on Wednesday in Queens.

The complaint suggests that Officer Valle, who worked in the 26th Precinct in Manhattan and lives in Forest Hills, Queens, never followed through on any of the acts he is accused of discussing. He was charged with federal kidnapping conspiracy, and is expected to appear in Federal District Court in Manhattan on Thursday afternoon. Officer Valle is married.

In one message to a co-conspirator, Officer Valle wrote that he was contemplating cooking a person “over a low heat” so as to “keep her alive as long as possible,” according to the complaint.

“The allegations in the complaint really need no description from us,” Mary E. Galligan, the F.B.I.'s acting assistant director, said in a statement. “They speak for themselves. It would be an understatement merely to say Valle’s own words and actions were shocking.”

The criminal complaint describes two separate episodes in which Officer Valle discussed abducting women. In each case it appears that the women knew the officer vaguely.

In an episode in February, Officer Valle sent an online message to another unnamed person in which he offered to kidnap a woman on the person’s behalf for a price: “$5,000 and she is all yours,” the officer wrote, according to the complaint.

“Just so that you know, she may be knocked out when I get her to you,” Officer Valle wrote, according to the criminal complaint. “I don’t know how long the solvent I am using will last but I have to knock her out to get her out of her apartment safely.”

Officer Valle appeared to be under the impression that the person he was communicating with intended to rape the woman, according to the criminal complaint.

“She will be alive,” he wrote. “It’s a short drive to you. I think I would rather not get involved in the rape. You paid for her. She is all yours and I don’t want to be tempted the next time I abduct a girl.”

Officer Valle also wrote that he would not budge on his $5,000 price: “Like I said this is very risky and will ruin my life if I am caught.”

While the complaint does not identify the woman in question, F.B.I. agents later learned that cellphone tracking devices indicated that Officer Valle had made or received phone calls on the block in Manhattan where the woman lived. When an F.B.I. agent interviewed the woman, she said she did not know Officer Valle well.

In a search of the officer’s computer, federal investigators discovered “files pertaining to at least 100 women,” according to the complaint.

“The F.B.I. has identified and interviewed 10 of these women, each of whom has confirmed to the F.B.I. that Valle is known to her,” the complaint said.

In the search, federal agents also discovered a document Officer Valle had created that appeared to be a “blueprint” for “abducting and cooking” another woman, according to the complaint, which redacts the name of the victim.

In one message from July 19, Officer Valle sent an instant message to a person described as a “co-conspirator,” indicating that he was meeting with the intended victim three days later, according to the complaint. The victim, who was later interviewed in October by the F.B.I., said she had met the officer that day “at a restaurant for lunch,” according to the complaint. What happened during or after the lunch was not disclosed.

At least he's not the kind of sicko who would abduct a woman and eat her raw.

[George Cumby]

150ish

BEC burrito
Pastrami sammich and salad
almonds for pm snack
hot cheese sammies and tomato soup
big glass o milk and oreos for dessert

WoD:

5/3/1 DeadLift with El Gordo

[Freak Out]

Ok Cumby...we like you but this is boring... embellish man! Mix in some cheese curds and deep fried song birds or something. :)

[mraynrand]

212
B: Corn Chex
L: quesadilla, 2 apples, PB and honey bagel, forbidden doughnut
D: minute steaks, some sort of potatoe thing, Sam Adams, Bass Ale
E: 6 miles, 46 minutes
snack: four popsicles, random crap from the fridge; honestly judge, I can't remember.

I am dehydrated

[George Cumby]

Ok Cumby...we like you but this is boring... embellish man! Mix in some cheese curds and deep fried song birds or something. :)

The cheese curds in Cali suck. :x

[MadtownPacker]

Poppy muffin and chocolate milk for breakfast
Italian sub and soda for lunch
over roasted chicken and macNcheese
not enough water, plenty of dank throughout day

[MadtownPacker]

The cheese curds in Cali suck. :x
I hate to say it but you are right. The ones in WI kicked ass. Ate the whole fucking bag along with a damn butter burger!

[George Cumby]

I hate to say it but you are right. The ones in WI kicked ass. Ate the whole fucking bag along with a damn butter burger!

Fuckin' A Culvers Butter Burgers! I knew you were ok, Mad.

Nothing like squeaky Wisco' cheese curds.

[MadtownPacker]

Fuckin' A Culvers Butter Burgers! I knew you were ok, Mad.

Nothing like squeaky Wisco' cheese curds.I think it was a Culvers or maybe that was where we got the fucking custard. Honestly, WI folks eat just like Mexicans, nothing but fattening shit that taste great.

[HowardRoark]

10 mile "Monster Dash" run; did not see Swede wheezing.

[MJZiggy]

breakfast: salted caramel hot chocolate
Lunch: 2 eggs and toast made from sunflower nut bread
Snack: salted caramel ice cream (we're supposed to have a stupid hurricane here and I gotta eat it before the power goes out--preventative measures, you see)
Dinner: I'll let you know when I get to it.
Exercise: running my ass off trying to get this house ready to sell.

[MJZiggy]

And Mad, it was Culvers on my trek to have daily custard.

[SkinBasket]

http://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/534720_420308251358039_2008944089_n.jpg

[SkinBasket]

Went out for a fancy diner last night. It's turned into a colon cleansing this morning. Must have been the pork belly. Or the pretentious fucking art museum party my wife dragged me to and we tried to ditch at the last minute, but the hostess graciously added our names to a secret list so we could look at a bunch of shitty pictures and listen to assfucks dressed in 1930's period costumes verbally masturbate each other. I think I almost died. Sometimes when you hang out at these "events" you are forced to realize just how many people are fucking disconnected from reality. Whatever. I'm sure they had a great time.

[Deputy Nutz]

HYPOCRITE!!!

You are the most out of touch asshole I have ever met.

[SkinBasket]

HYPOCRITE!!!

You are the most out of touch asshole I have ever met.

Yeah, but I keep it to myself. I don't dress up like some fucking retard and join a herd of other shitsticks to feel less lonely and pathetic.

[Freak Out]

Have you been salting beef to stock the bunker with?

[SkinBasket]

I'm going to be raising chickens and rabbits. Eat fresh.

I do need to secure a few crates of vodka though.

[swede]

I'm going to be raising chickens and rabbits. Eat fresh.

I do need to secure a few crates of vodka though.

Isn't vodka "moonshine" made out of potatoes?

A guy with a talent for distilling alcohol would be a popular neighbor in the post-apocalyptic era.

[MadtownPacker]

HYPOCRITE!!!

You are the most out of touch asshole I have ever met.
That's awfully harsh. It sounds like he fit in well with those beatniks.

[Deputy Nutz]

Skinbasket doesn't fit in with anybody. You should see the looks I get from my own family when he comes over. "Like why the fuck do you hang out with this guy?" type looks

[MadtownPacker]

Skinbasket doesn't fit in with anybody. You should see the looks I get from my own family when he comes over. "Like why the fuck do you hang out with this guy?" type looks
Are they scared of him?

[Deputy Nutz]

Not really, I mean what is there to be afraid of? Maybe he gives them the creeps though.

[MadtownPacker]

Not really, I mean what is there to be afraid of? Maybe he gives them the creeps though.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlH89im7SmQ

[SkinBasket]

Are they scared of him?

To the contrary.

[mraynrand]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlH89im7SmQ

That looks like a fun date movie