NFL Coaches I Would Personally Love To Punch In the Face

[Smidgeon]

Pete Carroll Whining about officiating instead of accepting his team was beaten. PFT has more on that. He is definitively classless.

Since Jim Harbaugh is back in college ball, that's the extent of my list right now.

[Fritz]

I can't stand either Harbaugh, and U of M is my alma mater.

I haven't liked a U of M coach since Gary Moeller in the 90's.

Can I punch John Elway in his horse face, even though he's not a coach?

[George Cumby]

I like this game!

After Smidg punches Carroll in the face, I get dibs on kicking him in the groin and whatever it is that lives down there.

[sharpe1027]

Carroll's exit before a final verdict on mess at USC says all you need to know about his character.

Can we go back a little bit in time? Jim Schwartz was near the top of my list during his stint with the Lions.

[pbmax]

I can't stand either Harbaugh, and U of M is my alma mater.

I haven't liked a U of M coach since Gary Moeller in the 90's.

Can I punch John Elway in his horse face, even though he's not a coach?

Yes.

[Guiness]

Saw Jim Harbaugh this past week-end going off on a member of the ref crew at Michigan's game.

Seems to me there's quite an inequity there. What does that college ref make? Probably well under $100K/year for that job, and he's getting dressed down by a guy making pretty close to 100x his salary.

[mraynrand]

Kevin Gilbride - he's used to it

[pbmax]

Kevin Gilbride - he's used to it

Has to be someone other than a Packer fan, otherwise it simply looks like sour grapes. Now if Ras wants to belt him, be my guest...

[mraynrand]

Thinking of Ryans, how about Rex Ryan, coach of the Bills. That's a smug face that needs a good stiff shot. He might be as arrogant as Aaron Rodgers.

[George Cumby]

I'd like to kick Rex in the face but he'd probably get turned on.

[Bossman641]

Would definitely punch Carroll in the face. Would also punch Jason Garrett on account of the 96 Thanksgiving game.

[MadtownPacker]

That darkie from the steelers deserves a beating also. Tripping players and acting all arrogant, glad M3 bitch slapped him in the big game.

[Cheesehead Craig]

John Fox. Because all Bears coaches deserve one.

[mraynrand]

That darkie from the steelers deserves a beating also. Tripping players and acting all arrogant, glad M3 bitch slapped him in the big game.

is he more arrogant than Rodgers? Or just 'uppity?'

[Smidgeon]

Agree on Jim Schwartz too. But he's irrelevant now. Which is probably worse. Carroll isn't getting fired anytime soon... ��

[Upnorth]

If we can activate the time machine for schwartz, I call dibs on slapping Mike Sherman when ever he felt like making personnel decisions

[mraynrand]

If we can activate the time machine for schwartz, I call dibs on slapping Mike Sherman when ever he felt like making personnel decisions

which ones? Bringing in Al Harris or drafting Javon Walker, or drafting Ahmad Carroll and Joey Thomas?

I don't understand the Sherman hate when there are so many other delicious options.

Right now I kinda wish Harlan was coaching. :)

[Teamcheez1]

which ones? Bringing in Al Harris or drafting Javon Walker, or drafting Ahmad Carroll and Joey Thomas?

I don't understand the Sherman hate when there are so many other delicious options.

Right now I kinda wish Harlan was coaching. :)

Brett Conway rocked! Especially stealing him in the 3rd round.

[MadScientist]

How is it nobody listed Bill Belichick yet? His cheating face deserves a good fist.

[Tony Oday]

Billicheat and Carroll the gum chomper.

[Guiness]

which ones? Bringing in Al Harris or drafting Javon Walker, or drafting Ahmad Carroll and Joey Thomas?

I don't understand the Sherman hate when there are so many other delicious options.

Right now I kinda wish Harlan was coaching. :)

Sherman? If for no other reason, he gets punched for carrying 2 punters for an entire season. Ya, cuz something you have to worry about is the punter who couldn't make your squad getting scooped up. Don't try and put him on the ps, gotta keep him on the 53! :bang:

[pbmax]

Brett Conway rocked! Especially stealing him in the 3rd round.

That kid was pretty talented but someone needed to settle him down after the rough patch. He went out and practiced until he was injured. He had a heck of a leg.

The one McGinn hobby horse I do agree with is that coaches still treat kickers like they are a combination of unknown technology and hazardous material; they don't understand how they work, they don't want to know and they want to get rid of them if they continue not to work before they infect the team. M3 doesn't treat them like lepers (and his support of Mason during his lost year was almost brave), but the most astute observation I have ever heard about a kicker from the Packer staff is "he is really striking the ball well/not well".

[HarveyWallbangers]

How about Denny Green?

[TravisWilliams23]

If you're playing the time machine game, I'd have to choose Mike Shanahan. Definitely face AND balls. Today, ole Pete fur shur.

[Bretsky]

our last two departed special teams coaches

[KYPack]

our last two departed special teams coaches

Mike Stock?

He was stupider than the other goof!

[George Cumby]

Hank fucking Stram. Loudmouth.

[pbmax]

You can't punch the man who gave us 'matriculating down the field'!

You can have a go at Buddy Ryan instead.

[vince]

It's all Petey for me.

https://thetwincitygazette.files.wordpress.com/2014/10/petecarroll.jpg

That guy should have taken a shot right there. BAM!

[mraynrand]

Top choice by far:

http://cdn.meme.am/instances2/500x/2031956.jpg

[George Cumby]

i for one would love to punch Ditka but would simply be too afraid to, even given the chance......

Carroll just isn't scary.

[vince]

Chip Kelly's hanging in the balance and could go either way at this juncture for me.

He's either a megalomaniac or a really smart guy who's confident enough to make unconventional moves to build a winner. His "my way or highway" approach and propensity to throw his players under the bus in the face of failure pushes him strongly toward the dick list though.

He'll get his ass kicked right back to the college ranks quickly if they don't turn things around in a serious way.

[Joemailman]

Is there a way to punch him without actually coming into contact with him?

https://rockthewristband.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/pete-carroll.jpg

[Patler]

Carroll's exit before a final verdict on mess at USC says all you need to know about his character.

Can we go back a little bit in time? Jim Schwartz was near the top of my list during his stint with the Lions.

Agreed.

and

Agreed.

[pbmax]

There can be only one.


https://usatftw.files.wordpress.com/2013/07/ap-super-bowl-football.jpg?w=1200

[Fritz]

There can be only one.


https://usatftw.files.wordpress.com/2013/07/ap-super-bowl-football.jpg?w=1200


Those Harbaugh boys. Dicks 1and 1A.

And for the record, I'd like to sock Fran Tarkenton right in the ol'' nut sack, even if he only ever coached pee wee football.

[wootah]

Rock Gullickson.

[mraynrand]

There can be only one.


(deleted for the sake of humanity)

please don't do that ever again

[KYPack]

Had more solid hate in the old days.

Buddy Ryan and Rex for dessert.
Ditka
Parcells even tho I respected the hell out of both of 'em.
Jerry Glanville Just because
Jimmy Johnson To see his hair fly
Pete Carroll screaming at him while I did it.
3 or 4 other guys I have forgotten

[hoosier]

Barry Switzer: a-hole who lived off of what Jimmy Johnson built
Les Steckel: because war is hell
Jim Mora: it was his incompetence following Holmie that led Allen to hire Carroll

[pbmax]

I have a soft spot for Switzer, even if he was an idiot. Its not based on his Cowboys stint, but how much trouble he caused College Football when he was at Oklahoma. He was the Jerry Tarkanian of college football.

Bob Stoops isn't nearly as entertaining.

[hoosier]

For me Switzer's name will always be associated with those cowboy teams of the mid 90s that meant annual elimination from postseason for so many Packer teams. I have a respectful hatred for those teams but Switzer was just along for the ride so no respect.

[KYPack]

Hoosier, Les Steckel was a name I was trying to think of.

Except Steckel basically punched himself in the face.

One of the Minny papers had a funny headline on the sports page the day after Steckel was canned:

"Less Steckel"

[mraynrand]

For me Switzer's name will always be associated with those cowboy teams of the mid 90s that meant annual elimination from postseason for so many Packer teams. I have a respectful hatred for those teams but Switzer was just along for the ride so no respect.

that's why I don't care to strike him. Guy got used by Jerry to stick it to Jimmy Johnson, showing that a total idiot could win a title with those players. Of course, then there's Dave Campo who proved you can't win at all, with any talent.

Jimmy Johnson would seemingly be fun to punch, but I bet he'd cry.

[Fritz]

Hoosier, Les Steckel was a name I was trying to think of.

Except Steckel basically punched himself in the face.

One of the Minny papers had a funny headline on the sports page the day after Steckel was canned:

"Less Steckel"


On other hand, Jerry Burns is my favorite Vikings' coach ever.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNcBFZ26lcI

[mraynrand]

^^^^ OMG! F-Bombs for everyone!

[vince]

That reminds me of me after the Bostick Bumbling Brainfart in Seattle last year.

[hoosier]

that's why I don't care to strike him. Guy got used by Jerry to stick it to Jimmy Johnson, showing that a total idiot could win a title with those players. Of course, then there's Dave Campo who proved you can't win at all, with any talent.

Ok, so you don't hit him with a closed fist. But he at least deserves a backhand. What I'm not sure about is whether the fact that Jones used him as you say is a mitigating or contributing factor.

[mraynrand]

That reminds me of me after the Bostick Bumbling Brainfart in Seattle last year.

except that's Burns after a win. You should have heard him after a loss. I'm telling you the Minneapolis Star Tribune the day after losses didn't have a lot of Burns' quotes.

[mraynrand]

Ok, so you don't hit him with a closed fist. But he at least deserves a backhand. What I'm not sure about is whether the fact that Jones used him as you say is a mitigating or contributing factor.

:)

[hoosier]

That Jerry Burns video is the best. The only thing that would improve it would be Walter Matthau playing Burns.

[Rastak]

Hoosier, Les Steckel was a name I was trying to think of.

Except Steckel basically punched himself in the face.

One of the Minny papers had a funny headline on the sports page the day after Steckel was canned:

"Less Steckel"


I certainly remember that. By the end of the year I was calling him "Tess".

[Rastak]

On other hand, Jerry Burns is my favorite Vikings' coach ever.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNcBFZ26lcI


Jerry was awesome, great OC and a good head coach too. He was one Salty son-of-a-bitch.

[KYPack]

Burnsy is undoubtedly my favorite coach of a rival, especially the Queens.

Jerry Burns was a staunch believer in the "drink a fifth after a win and a quart after a loss" theory of coaching.

Former GBP assistant, ya know.

[Rastak]

Burnsy is undoubtedly my favorite coach of a rival, especially the Queens.

Jerry Burns was a staunch believer in the "drink a fifth after a win and a quart after a loss" theory of coaching.

Former GBP assistant, ya know.That I did not know. I thought the OC he was referencing was from GB.....Bob Schnelcker.


Man the end was funny, "Fuck, they put his picture up there and the fuckers boo him............fuckers"

[Rastak]

I do recall we loved to rip Bob Schnelcker......whenever anything went wrong.

[mraynrand]

I do recall we loved to rip Bob Schnelcker......whenever anything went wrong.

so did we..when he was our OC. "Run the reverse to Lofton - again!"

[hoosier]

I don't think Burns ever worked for the Packers. According to profootballreference he was OC for the Viquings from '68 through '85 and then took over as HC when Grant retired in '86. He burned through fifths and quarts until '91. Holy sh** that is a long time to spend with one team.

[George Cumby]

Nope. He was an assistant under Lombardi.

[KYPack]

Ol Whiskey ( a nickname also given to Viking QB Tommy Kramer) was the Packer RB coach from '66 - '67. Burnsy was known for his attention to detail and on rare occasions, the resolve to holler back at VINCE LOMBARDI. One time, Jerry yelled "Now Goddammit coach, that's the way we put that play in". Lombardi checked and Burns was right. Deep down, VTL loved it when people came back at him. Not many did, hell Bengston never hollered at Vince. Presumably, Jerry left a couple fucks out of that sentence, the straight-laced Lombardi didn't tolerate the "f" word around him.

When Vince retired as HC, Bud Grant hired Jerry as the Vikes OC and he got the top job later on. Burns was respected throughout the league as a hard working guy who wouldn't back down to any fucking bullshit, ya know? Burnsy wasn't an old school pro coach. he was the bricks, sand, & mortar used to build the old pro coach school.

Under Burnsy, you could drink, fuck, and party as much as you wanted, as long as you worked hard, played like a warrior on Sunday, and won the fucking ball game.

[Maxie the Taxi]

Mike Tice must have graduated from Burnsy's old pro coach school. He had everything down pat but the winning part.

[gbgary]

That darkie from the steelers deserves a beating also. Tripping players and acting all arrogant, glad M3 bitch slapped him in the big game.

lol

carrol and hoodie

edit: love the jerry burns stuff. greatness. lol

[Patler]

I remember Burns in GB under Lombardi, I also remember Schnelker as Lombardi's WR coach. He came back later as OC in the '80s.

[mraynrand]

I remember Burns in GB under Lombardi, I also remember Schnelker as Lombardi's WR coach. He came back later as OC in the '80s.

OC under Bart. Was in charge of those fantastic offenses of Dickey and Co. Damn he loved that reverse to Lofton. And it almost won us that Divisional game in Dallas in '82.

[Patler]

OC under Bart. Was in charge of those fantastic offenses of Dickey and Co. Damn he loved that reverse to Lofton. And it almost won us that Divisional game in Dallas in '82.

They sure were entertaining on offense.

[Maxie the Taxi]

PHIL SIMS! He's not a coach but he's deserving announcer. Just pissed me off with an inane Arod comment.