AtlPackFan
02-12-2007, 01:37 PM
Someone forwarded this to me. I don't know if he made it up or if he got it from somewhere but some of it is pretty good...
Jack Bauer once got a taped confession from a mute.
People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer's resume simply reads, "Jack Bauer".
If everyone at CTU listened to Jack Bauer, it wouldn't be 24...it would be 12.
Jack Bauer found Waldo and killed him.
The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
Only Jack Bauer can fly a plane from the luggage compartment.
Jack Bauer doesn't breathe. The air hides in his lungs for protection.
Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the bomb was.
Jack Bauers calendar has no April 1st, no one fools Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up their location.
When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade.
Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice
Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
Jack Bauer doesn't eat, sleep, or use the bathroom because his organs are afraid of making him angry.
Jack Bauer is the 'I' in team.
Beaten to a pulp, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."
There have been no terrorist attacks in United States since Jack Bauer has appeared on television. ((is that true??))
Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
The state of California plans to reduce violent crime by changing the method of capital punishment from lethal injection to Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer once got a taped confession from a mute.
People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer's resume simply reads, "Jack Bauer".
If everyone at CTU listened to Jack Bauer, it wouldn't be 24...it would be 12.
Jack Bauer found Waldo and killed him.
The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
Only Jack Bauer can fly a plane from the luggage compartment.
Jack Bauer doesn't breathe. The air hides in his lungs for protection.
Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the bomb was.
Jack Bauers calendar has no April 1st, no one fools Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up their location.
When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade.
Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice
Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
Jack Bauer doesn't eat, sleep, or use the bathroom because his organs are afraid of making him angry.
Jack Bauer is the 'I' in team.
Beaten to a pulp, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."
There have been no terrorist attacks in United States since Jack Bauer has appeared on television. ((is that true??))
Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
The state of California plans to reduce violent crime by changing the method of capital punishment from lethal injection to Jack Bauer.