My kid laughed...
Then again, I gave it the wrong song. "It's Dynomite, mom!"
Oops.
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My kid laughed...
Then again, I gave it the wrong song. "It's Dynomite, mom!"
Oops.
So I went into Sam's club this morning to pick some shit up while my kid's at art class. But I forgot to poop this morning, so by the time I get there, there's some serious downward pressure. grab a cart, find a nice display with some really nice gloves for only like $12, so I get them and head to the restroom. That's when things get dicey. You see, usually Sam's club keeps a reasonably clean restroom, but, and I never thought this existed, this is a "black" Sams club, so there's a couple guys who look homeless sitting on the bench right outside the men's room and it turns out there's some really long afro hairs on the toilet seat. So I want to be done with this quickly before I get a virus or robbed. So I start pushing while I'm squatting because I don't want my ass cheeks to be in contact with the seat for too long. Unfortunately, while I'm pushing out 1.5 pounds of sound, I'm also not aware that my cock is askance, and as such, I'm pissing on my shorts and underwear. Long story short, I pissed on myself. And I didn't get my gloves because I thought I should probably head home and change. Kind of a disappointing Sam's Club trip overall.
You could have saved yourself a lot of trouble by taking your dump directly into one of the gloves in the glove aisle. I fully expected you to do that and am somewhat disappointed that you failed to realize that opportunity. Now go back to being scared of black people.
They have black people in Cincinnati? I had no idea. I thought Venus Flytrap was the only one.
Apparently their are a lot of black people in Cincy.
We have all pissed on ourselves.
Black people piss their pants all the time. 'Sall good
We can get that pissing yourself issue fixed while we're down there if you like.
http://www.theurologygroup.cc/images/doctors/34.jpg
But they don't belong in Sams Club. It's a club for a reason, and when was the last time you met a black person named Sam? The first time I went there, during gold club hours mind you, I got stuck at the register behind a black lady in a motorized scooter and two younger black folks behind her. We waited for several minutes while this fat woman, on oxygen, on the scooter, paid her $47 dollar and some cents bill with singles, folded into packs of ten. Of course the cashier had to unfold them all and count them. I was about to quip to the people behind her that she must be the oldest stripper I've ever seen, but was glad I didn't when it became obvious that they were with her, but paying separate, braking the order into parts and further delaying the entire process. I knew, I KNEW, it was a bad idea going there again.
Yeah, I know. That's why I wasn't so concerned about it, walking out of Sams Club with a soaked ass. I mean, I totally hosed them. I guess I could have stood in front of the hand dryer for a few minutes, but by then I was just disappointed and wanted to leave.
Cosco.
You've never met any of those guys.
you don't know shit, I met two of um
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSfGvptL_TY