"The great thing about this grass, is you can play 36 holes on it, and then go home and get stoned to bejesus off it"
Cannonball comin!
"The great thing about this grass, is you can play 36 holes on it, and then go home and get stoned to bejesus off it"
Cannonball comin!
"Litre is French, for give me some f*ckin cola!"
"Hey you, pick up that blood"
"You gonna eat your fat?"
"Get dressed Spaulding your playing Golf. No I'm not Grandpa I'm playing tennis. Your playing golf and you'll like it. What about my asthma?" I'll give ya asthma"
"100 bucks says the Smales kid picks his nose"
"Can you make a bull shot? Can you make a shoe smell?"
"Hey Wang, what's with all the pictures it's a parking lot"
"Do me a favor and don't tell anyone here your Jewish, I think this place is restricted, OK fine."
"Litre is French, for give me some f*ckin cola!"
Link:
www.carlspackler.com
Thanks for the Link Iron Mike.
"Litre is French, for give me some f*ckin cola!"
So I said hey Llama how about a little something for the effort? He says there will be no money , but when you are dying on your deathbed you will recieve total consciousness. So I got that going for me...which is nice.
Chris: Dad, what's the blow-hole for?
Peter: I'll tell you what it's not for, son. And when I do, you'll understand why I can never go back to Sea World.
I want you to kill all the gophers. Correct me if I'm wrong but if I kill all of the golfers they will lock me up and throw away the key.
Chris: Dad, what's the blow-hole for?
Peter: I'll tell you what it's not for, son. And when I do, you'll understand why I can never go back to Sea World.
"That's gophers you idiot!
Not my fault nobody can understand ya, ya fuzzy little foreigner"
"Oh you wore green cause you thought you could hide"
"Mrs. Poole......I got a salami to hide...................youre lean youre mean, and youre not too far in between are ya you little monkey woman"
"She's a tramp!"
"Litre is French, for give me some f*ckin cola!"
How do you no the weed is any good?
I got it from a negro.
Chris: Dad, what's the blow-hole for?
Peter: I'll tell you what it's not for, son. And when I do, you'll understand why I can never go back to Sea World.
"You do drugs Danny?
"Every day."
"So what's the problem?"
"I don't know."
"Litre is French, for give me some f*ckin cola!"
A lot of people don't know about manganese
Its a mix of kentucky blue grass and California sensemea
Chris: Dad, what's the blow-hole for?
Peter: I'll tell you what it's not for, son. And when I do, you'll understand why I can never go back to Sea World.
"It's easy to grin when your ship has come in
and ya got the stock market beat.....
but a man worth while
is a man who can smile
when his shorts are too tight in the seat."
"Litre is French, for give me some f*ckin cola!"
OH RAT FARTS!!!!
"How about a Fresca?"
"Somebody step on a duck?"
"Were did it go?"
"Right in the lumber yard"
Al Czervik: Hey everybody, we're all gonna get laid.
Al Czervik: You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?
Carl Spackler: He's on his final hole. He's about 455 yards away, he's gonna hit about a 2 iron I think.
Carl Spackler: Oh Mrs. Crane, you're a little monkey woman. Yeah, you're lean, mean, and I bet you're not too far in between are ya. How'd you like to wrap your spikes around my...
Groundskeeper Sandy: Carl. Damn your eyes. I told you, today is the day we change the holes. Now, do it, and no more slacking off.
Carl Spackler: I'll slack you off, you fuzzy little foreigner.
Lacey Underall: My uncle says you've got a screw loose.
Ty Webb: Your uncle molests collies
Don't sell yourself short Judge, you're a tremendous slouch.
Judge Smails: Gambling is illegal at Bushwood sir, and I never slice.
Judge Smails: Damn
Al Czervik: OK, you can owe me.
Judge Smails: I owe you nothing.
Judge Smails: Ty, what did you shoot today?
Ty Webb: Oh, Judge, I don't keep score.
Judge Smails: Then how do you measure yourself with other golfers?
Ty Webb: By height.
I smell varmint poontang. And the only good varmint poontang is dead varmint poontang, I think.
Ty: I'll drop by. You drop by my place any time.
Carl:What's your address? You're on Briar, right? Do you have a pool?
Ty: A pool and a pond. A pond would be good for you. Natural spring.
Danny: I gotta go to college.
Ty: You don't have to go to college. This isn't Russia. Is this Russia? This isn't Russia, is it?
Spalding: I want a hamburger, no, a cheeseburger. I want a hot dog. I want a milkshake...
Smails: You'll get nothing, and like it.
Ty: No, the thing is, do you want to go to college?
Danny: In Nebraska? (especially hilarious for those of us who went to school in Nebraska)
Love the film, prefer Life of Brian/ Monte Python quotes, though.
You would prefer that Brit slag, you fuzzy little foreigner!Originally Posted by Tarlam!
the only good varmint poontang is dead varmint poontang
Chris: Dad, what's the blow-hole for?
Peter: I'll tell you what it's not for, son. And when I do, you'll understand why I can never go back to Sea World.
Ty Webb: A flute without holes, is not a flute. A donut without a hole, is a Danish.
tyler
Receive thy new Possessor: One who brings
A mind not to be chang'd by Place or Time.
The mind is its own place, and in it self
Can make a Heav'n of Hell, a Hell of Heav'n.
"Paradise Lost"-John Milton
This crowd has gone deadly silent, a Cinderella story outta nowhere. Former greenskeeper and now about to become the masters champion.
favorite part
To much of a good thing is an awesome thing
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