Ted Is Trapped in the Closet, Chap. 11

You’re the beauty, the beauty I desire
Let’s watch Troy burn over Greece’s fire
And when everything has turned to dust
Together we can learn to trust
Just the two of us remains
True love can then began

Said Mac, “I don’t know where everybody is”
Said Ted, “Hush, Mac, just give me a kiss”
“Donâ⠂¬â„¢t worry about everyone, Mac, I attempt for us to fall”
“Winning, Mac, winning doesn’t matter to me at all”

Said Mac, “This profession has brought us together”
“Itââ €šÂ¬Ã¢â€žÂ¢s as if, Ted, as if we were meant for one another”
“Youâ⠂¬â„¢re a beautiful creature, Ted”
“Like a polar bear, like roses are red”
“Ted, you’re the only thing that’s real”
“Everything else is nothing, unreal”

Go to the practice field for the OTA
Insert Mac and his adulterous friend, Jag
Said Mac, “Where the hell is Harris!”
Said Jag, “I wouldn’t know if he’s in Paris”
“Iââ⠀šÂ¬Ã¢â€žÂ¢m just an offensive coordinator, Mac”
“I only worry about avoiding sacks”

“So, Mac, how did the confession with Ted go?”
Did you tell him our love is far more than so and so”
Sorry, Jag, it’ll have to wait another day”
I’m so smitten by what Ted has to say”
Why must Cupid strikes us all?”
In love with each other, we fall

I just want to smoke her weed
But I’m that hunger which she feeds
We’ll do it over and over again, sigh
Doesn’t matter so long as I’m high

(Note: these lyrics are inspired by Snow Patrol’s recent released album, Eyes Open, which is a splendid work of art)