Quote Originally Posted by SkinBasket View Post
So I was at my parent's house this weekend. Shooting with my dad, wife, and lastly, the brother-in-law. The stallion gets excited, runs around, slides into his gate and breaks it open, without our knowledge. After firing the last of my 40S&W into a hand drawn target of a woman wearing a peace shirt, I remove my ear protection and immediately hear a car driving up the driveway. I'm thinking one of us just shot someone through the woods, so I tell my worthless BIL that if we're in trouble, I'm going to tell them he was shooting. He didn't get the joke. Anyway, some huge assed woman gets out in a puff, saying there's a horse running down the highway. I told her we'd take care of it, so while I safely store the weapons, my BIL relates the message to the rest of the family, failing to relay the info about which direction the horse is in. We assemble our quick strike team, which means my mom and sister take the ATV and I tell my BIL we should go too, in their honda. Stop at the barn, grab a halter and a couple lead ropes.... My sister and mom go the wrong way. So my BIL says, don't worry, my sister has her fucking iPhone. So after a mile or so, we find a half dozen cars pulled over herding a horse off the highway. Call my sister... no answer. Tell my worthless BIL to call her while I jump from the moving car with a rope like a cowboy. The horse ran away, several times, much to the delight of all the country bumpkins. I have no idea how my brother in law felt, because he never got out of the car. After a mile long chase through a cemetery and a couple yards and farms, and with the help of a stranger with cowboy boots that weren't just for show, my 7 month pregnant sister and I corner the horse in a yard and latch him up, while my brother in law is still in the car. So My mom and I walk the horse the mile plus back to the farm while my disabled dad, BIL, and pregnant sister drive three vehicles - two cars and an ATV, back. After depositing said shit-faced fucktard animal back in his pen, guess how many vehicles were waiting for us. None. So we walk up the hill to the house. Guess how many of the casings were picked up. None. Guess how much of the shooting shit was put back. None. After cleaning up, it was nice to find them all watching some fucking HGTV show on redecorating someone's fucking kitchen in the house.

To sum up. Before and after an apocalypse, in-laws and horses are worth jack piss.
Maybe if you had invited your able bodied friend to come out shooting yesterday you would have had an actual usefull member of your party. But your rant does make some valid points about the people you want to wait out the appocalypes with. I do believe we have room for you and your family at our retreat. Since I will be in charge I can invite anyone I want, and kill anyone I want. It comes with the territory.