The Cleft Crusty Ongoing Season Blog

[Cleft Crusty]

Hi Folks,

For those of you who have been around these parts for a while you proabably know it is a tradition for Cleft Crusty to host a post game Q&A blog, where YOU, the inquiring fan, gets to ask all the crucially important questions about the game from a true expert -a man who has been around football his entire life. My credentials: 30+ years covering the Packers for the Milwaukee UrinalScented (even back when it was just the Milwaukee Urinal), a clip of self-righteousness, an ability to defend a GM like Matt Millen (if necessary), a willingness to insult know-nothing fans, a closet full of prescription meds for my various ailments, a love for authentic food, from authentic restaurants (not chain restaurants) - local mom and pop operations where stomach-eroding spices and food poison often skip happily hand-in-hand, and a working knowledge of all the ancient high school football stadiums throughout the midwest, gained from several thousand mile rides on my Harley, with wife in tow, swallowing various types of insects.

I thought it would be nice to start a blog, where you the fan can post questions and I can answer them. I received hundreds of PMs to start such a blog (in the interest of full disclosure, they were all from that guy mraynrand), so I thought I'd get things started. I'll still do the post game blogs, assuming I'm not in the hospital. But being semi-retired, I need this outlet - otherwise I'm going to have to clean the toilets for the wife - AGAIN.

[MadtownPacker]

Hey Cleft - What do you think of Ryan getting the "boot". Get it "boot"?

[Ballboy]

I'll bite:

The cutting of Ryan really confuses me. This guy was the 9th rated punter in the NFL last, and can run like the wind - as we've seen twice. Getting past the punting, my concern is two-fold:

1) With having a new long snapper with the old aged Davis hanging them up, wouldn't it be smart to have a constant punting the ball with the possibility of bad snaps?

2) From my memory, he never had problems holding for Crosby or Rayner for that matter. Now that is a huge question - new snapper, new holder!

I hope the offense can score, but our kicking needs to be strong...why make this move, why?

[Cleft Crusty]

Hey Cleft - What do you think of Ryan getting the "boot". Get it "boot"?

Don't give up your day job. What I found interesting is that the Redskins seemed to let Frost go for the same reason as the Packers. There is the Thompson quote about adapting to weather conditions - a definite reference to the game at Soldier Field. Also, Mike Stock, the ST coach seems to like Frost. But in the end, it's just a kicker. Kickers were created to annoy coaches. Be grateful the Packers have Thompson as GM, otherwise you could have ended up with both Ryan and Frost on the roster.

[Cleft Crusty]

I hope the offense can score, but our kicking needs to be strong...why make this move, why?

Don't lose sleep over the kicker - only coaches are allowed to worry about this. Your first concern - about the offense scoring - will determine the outcome of the season. The Kicking game will only affect the amount of time you have to get a beer or go to the toilet during fourth down and commercials. By halftime of the first game, I predict you will lose interest in the punting and holding game and will be concentrating of emptying your bladder. I know that with my enlarged prostrate, I need that extra time to do a good job.

[Spaulding]

Cleft, is Ryan Grant that much better than any other back on the Packers or did he benefit more-so from improved line play as the season wore on? Given we had little to no running game prior to his breakout I'd think the latter but then again BJack rushed for just over a hundred against the Lions towards the end of the season and otherwise looked to be improving as well.

[Cleft Crusty]

Cleft, is Ryan Grant that much better than any other back on the Packers or did he benefit more-so from improved line play as the season wore on? Given we had little to no running game prior to his breakout I'd think the latter but then again BJack rushed for just over a hundred against the Lions towards the end of the season and otherwise looked to be improving as well.

Good question. I think Grant is significantly better - for the Packers scheme - at running the ball. The idea is to follow the blocks, find that hole, put your foot down and burst up there. Any shake, has to be effective, but minimal. Grant has all that. Jackson isn't the same type of runner as Grant. Lumpkin is better suited to the ZBS, but he has nowhere near the burst of Grant. Jackson is still very intriguing as a third down back and receiver; Grant may be less skilled receiving.

[Maxie the Taxi]

1.

I predict you will lose interest in the punting and holding game and will be concentrating of emptying your bladder. I know that with my enlarged prostrate, I need that extra time to do a good job.

2.

Any shake, has to be effective, but minimal.

Crusty, I value your opinion in all areas, not just football. And since I'm very old and nearly retired myself, I have the same prostate problem you do. (By the way, that's prostate, not prostrate.) I made that same mistake once in the early sixties talking to a main squeeze of mine and it got me laid, but that's neither here nor there.

Anyway, I'm really wondering if Quote #2 above is related to football or to emptying your bladder?

[swede]

1.

I predict you will lose interest in the punting and holding game and will be concentrating of emptying your bladder. I know that with my enlarged prostrate, I need that extra time to do a good job.

2.

Any shake, has to be effective, but minimal.

...I'm really wondering if Quote #2 above is related to football or to emptying your bladder?

It'd be nice if your nose could teach your penis to sniff so you wouldn't have to stand there shaking it all day.

[Cleft Crusty]

1.

I predict you will lose interest in the punting and holding game and will be concentrating of emptying your bladder. I know that with my enlarged prostrate, I need that extra time to do a good job.

2.

Any shake, has to be effective, but minimal.

Crusty, I value your opinion in all areas, not just football. And since I'm very old and nearly retired myself, I have the same prostate problem you do. (By the way, that's prostate, not prostrate.) I made that same mistake once in the early sixties talking to a main squeeze of mine and it got me laid, but that's neither here nor there.

Anyway, I'm really wondering if Quote #2 above is related to football or to emptying your bladder?

You probably know the answer to your own question: There is only a fine line of separation between football and all other matters. If you are a good football fan - or like me, a good reporter who hates the game and is totally objective, but I still do my job - you will see all of life reflected in what happens on the gridiron.

And about Prostrate/Prostate. Clefty understands the difference - Prostrate is how Clefty lies on the ground, suffering from arrhythmia, before the beta-blockers take effect.

[Cleft Crusty]

1.

I predict you will lose interest in the punting and holding game and will be concentrating of emptying your bladder. I know that with my enlarged prostrate, I need that extra time to do a good job.

2.

Any shake, has to be effective, but minimal.

...I'm really wondering if Quote #2 above is related to football or to emptying your bladder?

It'd be nice if your nose could teach your penis to sniff so you wouldn't have to stand there shaking it all day.

Unfortunately, I have post-nasal drip from allergies. Unfortunately as well, 2000mg of benedryl doesn't help a dripping weasel, but is does convince your wife that you've passed on to your reward. Waking up in a funeral parlor is no fun, I can tell you that right now.

[Rastak]

Hey Cleft - What do you think of Ryan getting the "boot". Get it "boot"?

Be grateful the Packers have Thompson as GM, otherwise you could have ended up with both Ryan and Frost on the roster.

[boiga]

Is it just me or did Ted focus on improving special teams more than any other aspect of this team this offseason? Did Mike Stock gain greater influence on personnel decisions or what?

We kept three players on the roster : Bush, White, and Kuhn, who are special teams gamers but arguably worse at their position than three guys who were released: Culver, Hodge, and Herron. Also, we got rid of our power kicker to replace him with a finesse guy that Stock has had his eye on for over five years.

Did we always emphasize special teams this much in personnel decisions or is this something new? Our ST better kick ass, or this will really have been a wasted offseason.

[gbgary]

cleft...you're killing me. i can't really think of a question as i can hardly breathe and my eyes are full of tears. i very much look forward to your writings.

[pbmax]

Someone get this man a publisher!

And about Prostrate/Prostate. Clefty understands the difference - Prostrate is how Clefty lies on the ground, suffering from arrhythmia, before the beta-blockers take effect.

Unfortunately, I have post-nasal drip from allergies. Unfortunately as well, 2000mg of benedryl doesn't help a dripping weasel, but is does convince your wife that you've passed on to your reward. Waking up in a funeral parlor is no fun, I can tell you that right now.