Favorite Bears Joke

[VermontPackFan]

Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

I saw this kid on TV and thought the same thing. What was he thinking...?

[Little Whiskey]

Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

da baddests bear?

[denverYooper]

I saw this kid on TV and thought the same thing. What was he thinking...?

"Polish sassage, polish sassage"

[Cheesehead Craig]

Notre Dame hopes to play a game at Soldier Field in 2012. The Chicago Bears hope to beat them.

[Iron Mike]

A teacher tells the class she is a Bears fan. The class agrees with the exception of one girl. When asked who she likes the girl replies "the Packers". The teacher asks "Why?" The girl replies "'cause my Mommy and Daddy are Packer fans." The teacher replies "That's no reason, what if your dad was an idiot and your mom was a moron--what would you be?" The girl replies "A Bears fan."

[sheepshead]

A Green Bay Packers Fan is drinking in a New York bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar, announcing his wife has produced a typical Green Bay baby boy weighing 25 pounds. Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds,
but the Packer Fan just shrugs, "That's about average back home, folks, like I said, my boy's a typical Green Bay baby boy.

Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of "WOW!". One woman actually fainted due to sympathy pains.

Two weeks later, he returns to the bar. The bartender says, "Say, you're the father of that typical Green Bay baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth. Everybody's been making bets about how big he'd be in two weeks.
So how much does he weigh now?"

The proud father answers, "Seventeen pounds."
The bartender is puzzled, concerned, and a little suspicious.
"What happened? He already weighed 25 pounds the day he was born!"

The Green Bay father takes a slow swig from his Leinenkugel's beer, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says,

"...Had him circumcised!"

[bobblehead]

Bears fan and a Packers fan find a genie. the genie says "ok boys, its a recession, ONE wish each". Bears fan beams at the packer fan and says "I want you to put a 20 foot high impenetrable wall up around Illinois so no one can get in and no one can get out....I don't want any damn Packer fans in my state". Poof "its done" says the genie, turning his attention to the packer fan.

The packer fan scratches his head and says "tell me a bit about this wall". "Well, its the perfect wall, under no circumstances can anyone or anything get in or out of Illinois" replies the genie.

"and there are only bears fans there, and no packer fans?" asks the packer fan. "thats right" says the genie.

"OK, I'm ready to make my wish. Can you fill Illinois with water please".

[Bretsky]

A teacher tells her class she's a Bears fan. The class agrees with her except one little girl. When asked who she likes the girl said the Packers, the teacher asked why and the girl said "because my mommy and daddy are fans". The teacher replies "that's no reason to like them, what if your dad was an idiot and your mom was a moron then what would you be?" The little girl replied back, "a Bears fan"...

[Joemailman]

Hey B,

Iron Mike beat you to it by about 3 hours...and 4 posts.

[LP]

Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

Hey, this wouldn't be that BearsFan4Life person that was on JSO a few years ago would it?

[gbgary]

[green_bowl_packer]

What is Mike Tice asking for his tickets?

[Jimx29]

Two boys were playing football in a Green Bay area
park when one is attacked by a Rottweiler. Thinking
quickly, the other boy rips off a plank of the nearby
fence, wedges it down the dog's collar & twists, breaking
the dog's neck. A reporter who was strolling by sees
...the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy.
"Packers Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal,"
he starts writing in his notebook.
"But I'm not a Packers fan," the boy replied.
"Viking Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack,"
the reporter starts again.
"I'm not a Viking fan either," the boy said.
"Then what are you?" the reporter asked.
"I'm a Bears fan."
The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes,
"Redneck Bastard Kills Family Pet."

[Jimx29]

[Jimx29]