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Hi everybody, it's The Captain here, with a short, quick post/update that won't take very long.
I just wanted to check in with you all real quick and give you an update on how the Green Bay Packer football team has been affecting my life.
I haven't really been able to focus too much on the Packers as I've been depressed lately about the team losing games recently and all the injuries to players and such. Names and jersey numbers are changing almost daily, so it's tough to keep up.
In an effort to cheer myself up I went out and got together with Lariyah Daniels of the relatively unknown, and not very heavy metal band Hessler.
Here's a photo of us:
She's fucking sexy, yah?
Her name is pronounced pretty much like it's spelled and yes, it does indeed sound like "Larry, yah" which may sound a bit homo to all y'all out there, but I can completely assure you that she is ALL woman. I checked. Verified personally.
There's some things not to like of course.
She is Polish so all the Polack jokes my Grandpa and uncles used to tell can't stop flowing out of my big yapper. I guess I didn't know the library in my head of Polish jokes was so vast. I keep telling her she's a Polish lesbian... you know... because she likes guys!
Her band is based in Chicago so that's enemy territory as far as football is concerned. I try to only hang out with her outside of Illinois exclusively.
She tours a bit so she's probably banging other imaginary skull characters with awesome names from the internet here and there. But I'm not too jealous about it. "Way of the road" and all that.
She also complains sometimes when we're in bed doing it. You see her voice has "perfect pitch" so sometimes when we're banging I like to try to harmonize with her "sexual noises" if you know what I mean. All her noises are naturally in key and as a musician I just can't help myself!
It's apparently a frowned upon action in her sexy-time playbook.
Thankfully for her though - I kick ass enough to look past all of that AND her shitty band. I see her for the gorgeous, rough around the edges, slutty dressin', tongue-talented, hot bodied, bangable, busty, bleach-blonde, babe that she is.
Plus, I just absolutely LOVE that thing she does in my ear, with her tongue, while she firmly grips my wooden rod.
It drives me TOTALLY crazy:
Anyway...
Sorry if my posts here haven't been all that funny and maybe too short and too infrequent. It's REALLY tough to keep up with other posters Like Red and Woodbuck with their sheer frequency of posts. But they sure do hold down the fort and I'm sure there's some prize from Mad at the end of every year for most posts or something.
But things are really looking up for me and the Polish Lesbian. And things are looking up for the Green Bay Packers.
This probably means that things are looking up for you too.
~Kickass
I just wanted to check in with you all real quick and give you an update on how the Green Bay Packer football team has been affecting my life.
I haven't really been able to focus too much on the Packers as I've been depressed lately about the team losing games recently and all the injuries to players and such. Names and jersey numbers are changing almost daily, so it's tough to keep up.
In an effort to cheer myself up I went out and got together with Lariyah Daniels of the relatively unknown, and not very heavy metal band Hessler.
Here's a photo of us:
She's fucking sexy, yah?
Her name is pronounced pretty much like it's spelled and yes, it does indeed sound like "Larry, yah" which may sound a bit homo to all y'all out there, but I can completely assure you that she is ALL woman. I checked. Verified personally.
There's some things not to like of course.
She is Polish so all the Polack jokes my Grandpa and uncles used to tell can't stop flowing out of my big yapper. I guess I didn't know the library in my head of Polish jokes was so vast. I keep telling her she's a Polish lesbian... you know... because she likes guys!
Her band is based in Chicago so that's enemy territory as far as football is concerned. I try to only hang out with her outside of Illinois exclusively.
She tours a bit so she's probably banging other imaginary skull characters with awesome names from the internet here and there. But I'm not too jealous about it. "Way of the road" and all that.
She also complains sometimes when we're in bed doing it. You see her voice has "perfect pitch" so sometimes when we're banging I like to try to harmonize with her "sexual noises" if you know what I mean. All her noises are naturally in key and as a musician I just can't help myself!
It's apparently a frowned upon action in her sexy-time playbook.
Thankfully for her though - I kick ass enough to look past all of that AND her shitty band. I see her for the gorgeous, rough around the edges, slutty dressin', tongue-talented, hot bodied, bangable, busty, bleach-blonde, babe that she is.
Plus, I just absolutely LOVE that thing she does in my ear, with her tongue, while she firmly grips my wooden rod.
It drives me TOTALLY crazy:
Anyway...
Sorry if my posts here haven't been all that funny and maybe too short and too infrequent. It's REALLY tough to keep up with other posters Like Red and Woodbuck with their sheer frequency of posts. But they sure do hold down the fort and I'm sure there's some prize from Mad at the end of every year for most posts or something.
But things are really looking up for me and the Polish Lesbian. And things are looking up for the Green Bay Packers.
This probably means that things are looking up for you too.
~Kickass
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