Warning for tomorrow... Rumors will be wild...

[packers11]

April fools is tomorrow... DO NOT BIELEVE ANYTHING... just putting it out there... Even if its on ESPN, im not believing it until Monday...

Tomorrow I see it now...

"Moss to GB!!!" - April fools
"Turner to GB!!!" - April fools
"TT signs big FA" - April fools

[Joemailman]

Mike Sherman urges Houston GM to trade down and stockpile picks.

[woodbuck27]

Brett Favre is disappointed in Packer Management off season moves and decides to retire.

[esoxx]

Re: Warning for tomorrow... Rumors will be wild...

April fools is tomorrow... DO NOT BIELEVE ANYTHING... just putting it out there... Even if its on ESPN, im not believing it until Monday...

Tomorrow I see it now...

"Moss to GB!!!" - April fools
"Turner to GB!!!" - April fools
"TT signs big FA" - April fools

It'll be just like any other day this offseason then.

[HarveyWallbangers]

I think we should put a rule into effect. If people post, "Moss to Green Bay" like titles, they should go to the Rat Hole for a week.

[oregonpackfan]

Worse yet, tomorrow all the moderators of this forum convert to being Bears or Vikings fans!

[MJZiggy]

Bretsky gives up the quest for grailism...Nah, NOBODY would believe that one.

[packers11]

Brett Favre is disappointed in Packer Management off season moves and decides to retire.

haha that would be a good one...

[Jimx29]

My inside sources say that this thread is not valid

[retailguy]

Bretsky gives up the quest for grailism...Nah, NOBODY would believe that one.

C'ept Mrs. Bretsky.

[Brando19]

Breaking News: Lovie Smith seen smiling and joking around.

[red]

this topic should be pinned and in bold

[retailguy]

this topic should be pinned and in bold

good idea, but I can't seem to do that. Have to wait for MTP I guess.

My powers are limited. To many, that is probably a good thing.

[]{ilr]3]

Here are the latest ones for PFT. I started on top with the Mcnabb thing not thinking about it being april fools day and was just shaking my head no way. Then it dawned on me what day it was.

Some of these are pretty funny!

McNABB TO RETIRE?

Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb is contemplating retirement, a source close to McNabb tells us.

Per the source, McNabb has grown weary of rehabbing the ACL that he tore last season, and he has decided that he has had enough.

"He always gets hurt," said the source. "And he thinks that it's just going to happen again. So why bother spending all the time and effort getting healthy?"

McNabb has missed extensive time over the past several years with a broken ankle, a hernia, and the ACL tear.

The primary in-house options for the Eagles to replace him would be A.J. Feely and Kelly Holcomb. Holcomb was acquired a few days ago in a trade with the Bills. They also could bring in a proven veteran, such as Jeff George.


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MORE PARTS FOR PEYTON?

Though Colts quarterback Peyton Manning plans to continue to play football, he could have some other opportunities in the entertainment business.

Lorne Michaels, the producer and creator of Saturday Night Live, is pondering the possibility of making Manning a mid-season addition to the cast after Manning's football season ends in 2008.

"He's a natural," Michaels said, according to the New York Daily Post. "And he'd be a good influence on the rest of the cast. Even after the deaths of John Belushi and Chris Farley, some of those guys still haven't learned that it's not a good idea to constantly snort cocaine. Plus, Manning is a man's man. Some of the guys on our cast are a little bit, well, fruity. Not that there's anything wrong with it."

Manning's March 24 performance as host of the long-running show also has caught the eye of Hollywood, where Mel Brooks is now considering an offer to Manning for a role in the remake of Young Frankenstein.

"When I saw Manning with a skull cap on," said Brooks, "it was Peter Boyle all over again. Manning would be a perfect Frankenstein monster. But we'd have to get him into the gym. He's got the boobs of an eight-year-old boy."


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SNYDER TO SELL IF 'SKINS STUMBLE AGAIN?

After eight years of trying to take the Washington Redskins back to the Super Bowl, owner Dan Snyder could soon be admitting that he's not cut out for the role.

A league source tells us that, if the 'Skins fail to make the playoffs in 2007, Snyder might be firing the only person whom he hasn't fired yet. Himself.

"He seems to be starting to realize that he's the common denominator for every season since he bought the team," said the source. "The question right now is whether he loves the Redskins enough to walk away and let someone else take over."

The source said that another possibility would be for Snyder to sell the majority share of the team to someone else, and then to take a backseat to a new owner.


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WOLF WANTS BACK IN

After seven years of retirement, former Packers G.M. Ron Wolf is ready to give it another go.

Per a league source, Wolf is quietly making it known among Green Bay board members that he'd be willing to come back for another stint with the team, if the team were inclined to have him.

The source says that Wolf would only return if he has final say over the roster and the coaching staff, which means that Ted Thompson would have to be demoted or fired.

Wolf led the franchise to its only Super Bowl win in the past 40 years. Since he retired, the team generally has struggled.


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ABC/ESPN RESURRECTING GLADIATORS

With surprisingly strong rating from a recent American Gladiators marathon on ESPN Classic, an industry source tells us that ESPN and ABC plan to bring the show back, after more than a decade off the air.

And the early word is that ESPN will assign Joe Theismann to be the primary host of the show, which is expected to be aired on Sunday nights at 8:00 p.m., as an alternative to NBC's Sunday Night Football.

The plan is not to update the show, but to re-create the same spandex-and-steroids feel that the program created back in the late 1980s and early 1990s. With Theismann under contract to ESPN for the next four years and unwilling to serve as an analyst for college football games, the Gladiators franchise gives ESPN and ABC a way to force Theismann to work for his money.

And since Theismann served as a "commentator" on the show in 1989, he can't claim that he's being asked to do something that he's never before done in his broadcasting career.


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APRIL 1 (HINT, HINT) ONE-LINERS

Falcons QB Mike Vick has decided to fully embrace his fresh start in Atlanta by legally changing his name to Ron Mexico.

To create a roster spot for WR Calvin Johnson, the Raiders are moving WR Jerry Porter to quarterback; "He's already better than any quarterback we have under contract," coach Lane Kiffin said.

Former Dolphins coach Nick Saban is filing suit against the team for stealing a case of Little Debbie cakes that he accidentally left in his office after leaving in January. (Saban claims that the culprit was Dom Capers, since the goop inside of Devil's Squares apparently makes for an effective toupee paste.)

Steelers OL Alan Faneca has been skipping offseason workouts because he wants to play weakside linebacker in the team's new Tampa 2 defense; said Faneca, "If Lance Briggs can become a Pro Bowler in that spot, I can be a Hall of Famer."

In an effort to better relate to his players, Bengals coach Marvin Lewis had decided to attend law school at night.

Giants coach Tom Coughlin has apologized for comparing himself to Hitler; "Mussolini would have been more accurate," Coughlin said.

Bucs coach Jon Gruden was offended by Coughlin's Hitler comparison; "He's a f--king creampuff," Gruden said of Coughlin. "If anybody's a f--king Adolf Hitler, it's f--king me."

Joey Sunshine has weighed in on the controversy: "Why does Tom Coughlin think that he's like a former Kentucky basketball coach? That Coughlin definitely is no Norman Einstein."

Cowboys WR Terrell Owens has called a press conference to talk about the fact that no one has been talking about him very much in the offseason.

Former Vikings WR Cris Carter plans to come out of retirement; he'd instantly be installed as the No. 1 receiver on the depth chart.

Bears LB Lance Briggs has decided to sign his franchise tender and play for the team in 2007.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: It's April Fool's day. If you haven't already realized that everything posted from the McNabb retirement story to this point is completely and totally phony and made up, please convey our deepest condolences to your family, your friends, and anyone else who has to interact with you on a regular basis.]

[red]

{ilr]3]Here are the latest ones for PFT. I started on top with the Mcnabb thing not thinking about it being april fools day and was just shaking my head no way. Then it dawned on me what day it was.

i just saw all those too

but i went on that site knowing it was april 1st, so it didn't get me

there are some funny ones though

let the rumors of ron wolf returning begin