12 pound turkey challenge

[SkinBasket]

Fuck me.

Anyway, if I don't lose 12 pounds by Thanksgiving, I'm going to masturbate into a jar then artificially inseminate my neutered cat. How's that for consequences?

I weigh more than most of you today. I didn't exercise today because I'm sick. Everyone's sick. Even the cocksucking cat is sick. He hasn't eaten in two days, maybe three. He might die soon. I hope he does it tonight, because the garbage truck comes tomorrow. I last exercised last Wednesday, when I submitted two blue belts at jiu jitsu. One of them blew snot all over his face while I choked him. The other just gave up because I was suffocating him in my loins while working a kimura on his old ass.

Breakfast: water.
Lunch: Frappachino. Vanilla.
Dinner: Fried rice, tortilla chips and salsa con queso (that means cheese with salsa madtown) and like 5 or 6 mini candy bars.


I used to love you. Now I would throw you down a well without a second thought.

[Scott Campbell]

Sometimes I keep my feelings all bottled up inside of me. I'll bet the neighborhood cats are relieved.

[HowardRoark]

Re: 12 pound turkey challenge

I'm going to masturbate into a jar then artificially inseminate my neutered cat.

Be careful with your wrist.

[Freak Out]

I never realized you could fuck up formatting so much with just text?

[MJZiggy]

What the hell happened?

Would it make you feel better if I told you that today I had:

breakfast: hot chocolate and mixed nuts
tea
lunch: rice noodle soup, cheetos, 2 cookies, peanut m&ms
dinner: yogurt, cheese, a peanut butter cup and I'll think of something else eventually.

[SkinBasket]

I never realized you could fuck up formatting so much with just text?

My apologies. It has been fixed.

[SkinBasket]

What the hell happened?

I forgot to add the dinner bottle of pinot grigio + 1 glass of Riesling (for dessert).

[hoosier]

What's the rumpus? What happened to the previous turkey thread, the one with all the declarations and prognostications about lifting weights and losing weight and eating or not eating?

[SkinBasket]

weight: 204
exercise: none

breakfast: golden grahams and 2% milk
lunch: potatoes au gratin and 2% milk
dinner: 1 dozen crab rangoons, 1 mild beef szechuan beef with white rice, 3 vodka gimlets, and 1 peppermint candy.

Fuck ya'll.

[Zool]

Holy shit a dozen? Way to eat chubbs

[SkinBasket]

Holy shit a dozen? Way to eat chubbs

Yeah, well it's 7:30am and I've taken my 3rd shit of the day already.

[SkinBasket]

4.

[Little Whiskey]

4.

Wow, impressive.

[SkinBasket]

4.

Wow, impressive.

5. This one had an entirely undigested shitake mushroom in it.

[mraynrand]

This thread should be in the Sons of Anarchy thread