WI makes national news again

[oregonpackfan]

Monkey bites woman? Interesting, but stranger things have happened on Madison's State Street!

[packinpatland]

Police issued a warning to the public of the foot-tall monkey with a long prehensile tail: "It is now on the lam, presumably still in the State Street area."

They've probably been waiting a long time to actually say 'on the lam'.

[the_idle_threat]

Crime wave averted
.................................................. .....

Madison police capture wanted monkey

MADISON, Wis. (AP) — Authorities captured a diaper-wearing monkey who led them on a downtown search after biting a woman.

The 20-year-old woman reported being bitten on the thumb as she tried to pet the animal early Wednesday.

The woman was walking by State Street Brats, a popular nightclub, where a man had the monkey on a leash inside its beer garden. People walking by were petting the monkey, who was wearing a white diaper.

But the monkey bit the woman, who suffered four small punctures on her thumb, police said.

The bite sent the woman to the hospital, where a physician said the monkey should be found so that it could be quarantined to determine if it has a disease.

By 7:15 a.m., police found the man and the monkey. But the man lost the handle on the monkey before an animal control officer arrived and it got loose.

Police issued a warning to the public of the foot-tall monkey with a long prehensile tail: "It is now on the lam, presumably still in the State Street area."

About seven hours later, the monkey was captured and taken into custody downtown to be quarantined for 10 days, police said.

Police released the following photo of the man:







"Would you like to touch my monkey?"
"Touch him! Touch my monkey!"

[GBRulz]

Hmmm: What’s the charge for drinking and roof-walking?


It’s no secret that alcohol can cause problems for police in a variety of ways -- it was no different overnight for the Ashwaubenon Public Safety Department.


About 12:22 a.m. today, Ashwaubenon officers on patrol were flagged down and told there was an intoxicated male walking on the roof of the Midway Motor Lodge, 780 Armed Forces Drive.

Officers went up to the roof by a stepladder and got the male down. He was given a citation for disorderly conduct and released, according to a report

[GBRulz]

someone was having a good time after the game last night !

[GBRulz]

WAUKESHA, Wisconsin (AP) -- It was embarrassing enough that Mark Stahnke woke up in a neighbor's yard without his pants. Then he remembered they contained a cashier's check for $41,093, meant for his son, and several hundred dollars in cash.

But he got it all back Friday, including the pants, thanks to a man and his dog.

Stahnke said he doesn't know what happened between when he left the bar and when he woke up the next morning, and police were skeptical when he filed a report on Monday.

"We're used to hearing weird stories, but with his intoxication we figured this one would be different, that the amount of money wouldn't be exact," Police Lt. William Graham said. "How do you get so intoxicated that you lose your pants?"

Stahnke said he had met his son at a bar and doesn't remember much afterward.

"I woke up cold not knowing where the heck I was, and I didn't realize it at first because I still had my shoes and socks on," he said. "When I got up, I realized, my God, I don't have any pants."

Tim Curzan's dog, Joe, found the pants at an intersection, according to a police report. He found the cashier's check and tried twice, unsuccessfully, to deliver it and the cash to where he thought the owner lived.

On Wednesday, the pants were still at the intersection, so Curzan took them to the police, who contacted Stahnke to claim his belongings

[oregonpackfan]

Hmmm: What’s the charge for drinking and roof-walking?


It’s no secret that alcohol can cause problems for police in a variety of ways -- it was no different overnight for the Ashwaubenon Public Safety Department.


About 12:22 a.m. today, Ashwaubenon officers on patrol were flagged down and told there was an intoxicated male walking on the roof of the Midway Motor Lodge, 780 Armed Forces Drive.

Officers went up to the roof by a stepladder and got the male down. He was given a citation for disorderly conduct and released, according to a report

Maybe he had been listening to Carole King's song, "Up On The Roof."

[packinpatland]

WAUKESHA, Wisconsin (AP) -- It was embarrassing enough that Mark Stahnke woke up in a neighbor's yard without his pants. Then he remembered they contained a cashier's check for $41,093, meant for his son, and several hundred dollars in cash.

But he got it all back Friday, including the pants, thanks to a man and his dog.

Stahnke said he doesn't know what happened between when he left the bar and when he woke up the next morning, and police were skeptical when he filed a report on Monday.

"We're used to hearing weird stories, but with his intoxication we figured this one would be different, that the amount of money wouldn't be exact," Police Lt. William Graham said. "How do you get so intoxicated that you lose your pants?"

Stahnke said he had met his son at a bar and doesn't remember much afterward.

"I woke up cold not knowing where the heck I was, and I didn't realize it at first because I still had my shoes and socks on," he said. "When I got up, I realized, my God, I don't have any pants."

Tim Curzan's dog, Joe, found the pants at an intersection, according to a police report. He found the cashier's check and tried twice, unsuccessfully, to deliver it and the cash to where he thought the owner lived.On Wednesday, the pants were still at the intersection, so Curzan took them to the police, who contacted Stahnke to claim his belongings

The dog tried to deliver the check twice???
There's something missing in that last paragraph..........besides a pair of pants.

[GBRulz]

very good pickup, PIP ! I didn't even notice that!

[packinpatland]

MARSHFIELD, Wis. - How do you become a celebrity? How about being charged with drunken driving while you and a friend are trying to drive the same pickup truck home. It worked for two men, Harvey Miller, 43, and Edwin Marzinske, 55.


"I always thought I'd be famous, just not this way," said Miller, a paraplegic who was steering a pickup truck with Marzinske on the gas pedal and brakes when they were stopped on a Friday night in August.

"Pretty much everywhere we go it's people coming up, 'Hey, can we get our pictures with you? Can we get your autograph?'" he said Wednesday. "We never expected this to escalate."

The news also got twisted somewhat, the men said, blaming it in part on a Colby-Abbotsford police report said Miller had no legs. He has his legs but a logging accident left him paralyzed from the waist down. A message left for the police department wasn't immediately returned Thursday.

Both were cited for drunken driving and driving while revoked. They're planning to defend themselves in court with an argument that neither had control, so neither was driving.

Miller blew a 0.16 percent blood alcohol reading on the breath test and Marzinske was at 0.09 percent, the police report said. The legal limit is .08 percent.

Miller said he takes drunken driving seriously, "but we were doing things as safe as possible."

Police clocked them going 35 mph in a 55 zone.

Marzinske acknowledged the arrest was embarrasing.

"I asked my daughter right out, 'Are you embarrassed about this?'" he said. "She says, 'A little bit Dad, but it sure is funny.' So we just have fun with it. There isn't much else you can do."

[MJZiggy]

Why didn't Marzinske just drive? It doesn't say he was disabled and he only blew a .09 (comparatively). He probably could have made it without getting stopped...

[packinpatland]

Sounds little like 'dumb and dumber'

[retailguy]

Sounds little like 'dumb and dumber'

A little? These guys could have been the guys they patterned the movie after...

[mraynrand]

MARSHFIELD, Wis. -
"I asked my daughter right out, 'Are you embarrassed about this?'" he said. "She says, 'A little bit Dad, but it sure is funny.' So we just have fun with it. There isn't much else you can do."

That's good parenting!

[swede]

Load up the kids.
Ride giant trucks.
Listen to big guns explode.
Throw rocks at metal garbage can lids.

It's like Homer and Bart were on the fundraising committee.

http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=658446